What is “privilege?” Privilege is when a 23 year-old can turn his time working at a falafel takeout joint as a teenager into a Washington Post think piece about challenging his own privilege and not think the world will say, “Hey, fuck off.”

Muslim-people expert and maybe lonesome TV guy Bill O'Reilly says he "hates" having to tell "the world" about the Anthony Weinergate story, because of how embarrassing it all is. Now "the world" knows just how bad America's politicians are at using Twitter.

Online data miner and private investigator Joseph Culligan has noticed something curious: Bill O'Reilly's wife Maureen McPhilmy purchased a new house about a year ago, just down the street from the Long Island home she's shared with Bill-o since 2002. O'Reilly still owns the old one. And Fox News isn't saying whether they still live together.

In the cutthroat market for Trend Stories Centered in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, it pays to be the early bird. Not only does the neighborhood, populated by desperately trend-hungry fauxhemians, constantly cycle through the very latest microtrends; but its status as America's prototypical "hip neighborhood" means that even the merest hint of a new Williamsburg microtrend is almost immediately packaged and distributed by the equally trend-hungry media, to be feasted upon by the voyeuristic, trend-hungry public.

Whoa, Subway is now selling falafel? Yes, and Chicago is ablaze with rage over it.

Over the weekend in Lebanon, world food records of national importance were broken in a one-two punch.

Five years ago today, a luminous young producer at Fox News named Andrea Mackris enriched all of our lives just a little bit by suing a lecherous fathead named Bill O'Reilly for trying to rub falafel on her private parts.

Shepard Smith was riffing about the latest additions to the Webster's Dictionary today when he suddenly started reminiscing about a deli on 48th street that served great schwarma, crispy pita bread, hummus and, that's right, falafel. Oops!

Who can forget the day two falafel balls crashed into the two cheeseburgers? Starting with the gunning down of matzoh crackers by a German sausage, this edible reconstruction of war history since World War II is sacrilicious. The clip is below.