Can we please find a 29-year-old to reveal the 29 Things They've Learned in 29 Years?

This little girl, who's now destined for Ellen or something, was overcome with feelings watching the Chipettes (the '80s female version of Alvin and the Chipmunks) reunite a lost baby penguin with her family.

In a study of 200,000 users of Weibo (China’s version of Twitter), researchers at Beihang University in China have concluded that “anger is more powerful than other emotions” when it comes to the spread of information online. Basically, anger is viral.

People are so mad at Robert Pattinson and Katy Perry.

Provo-Orem, Utah is the nation's most optimistic metropolitan area, according to the results of a Gallup poll released earlier this week. This could explain why Provo-Orem, Utah just doesn't "get" your cynical, Big City humor.

Katie Couric tweeted at us today in response to us "making fun of her." Oh Katie, always just a couple steps behind. Late to comment on this swirling vat of Lana Del Rey internet bile, (late to the internet in general) and a few steps behind our old pal, Brian Williams.

There comes a time in the life of every newscaster when he or she must form an opinion on throaty-voiced source of national cathexis Lana del Rey. Katie Couric is still working on hers.

Manic stock-picking rodeo clown Jim Cramer is a study in lost popularity. When the stock market was roaring, he was funny and loveable; when the economy collapsed, he became a villain, a cartoonish symbol of America's idiocy and excess.

If you're a Botox user you're basically a zombie who's devoid of all emotion, according to new research. Talking to someone who uses Botox is sometimes tough, especially when you try to get a read on their expressions but can't get over the permanent look of shock on their face. But, in a bizarre twist, it goes both ways: The results of a study published in the journal Social Psychological and Personality Science have found that Botox patients can't understand your expressions, either.

Chicken, the easiest of all non-fish meats to convince yourself it's okay to eat on moral grounds, is now a little more difficult to rationalize consuming. A new study seems to indicate that the birds can feel empathy—meaning they can theoretically feel the pain and distress of other chickens:

In a new interview with Harper's Bazaar UK, the expat actress says that people mock her and her lifestyle website/newsletter Goop because "[a]ny time you do anything with any degree of sincerity, people make fun of you."

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton was on the Sunday talk shows today addressing some of the most pressing foreign policy issues of our time. Then Face the Nation host Bob Schieffer asked if she would submit to a TSA pat-down.

Though last year it was January 19th, this year Britain has declared that today, November 1st, is their most depressing day of the year. On account of the approaching cold and dark, consuming everyone. At least it's almost over, guys!

After reading the news that Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston are getting back together to live in wedded conservative bliss, I immediately went to FoxNews.com to read the joyful comments and get angry. Why do I do this to myself?

Ashley Dupre—former Spitzer hooker (and oversharer) but not bad person overall (but bad singer)—had some serious things about love to get off her chest. So she took to the internet. Sigh.

Zoms, guys. Lauren Conrad from The Hills and Chace Crawford from Gossip Girl (both silly teen shows, one "real," one fake) totally have text all the time. [Intel]

Big trouble at the New York Times Magazine this morning, as an editors' note reveals that one of the women who appeared in last week's cover story on female Iraq veterans never served in Iraq and might have made up much of what she told reporter Sara Corbett in her interview.