In response to a recent declaration by hip hop artist Lil Wayne that he doesn't like New York, Malcolm Smith, a Democratic state Senator representing Queens, appeared before reporters in Times Square today to demand an apology.

Expertly coiffed pop star Justin Bieber doesn't understand why Prince William's hair is thinning.

Just because there are no bottles flying in the air doesn't mean the fight between Chris Brown and Drake has settled down. Instead of a bar brawl, however, it's become a war of the words. (Looks like that boxing match is off the table.)

Rudy Giuliani may be officially supporting Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney, but that doesn't mean he thinks Romney's achievements trump his own.

If you were looking for NRA president Wayne LaPierre's response to the Trayvon Martin case, you're not going to find it. At the annual NRA meeting, LaPierre said he would not comment "without a full understanding of the facts." He did, however, accuse the media of not caring about other violent crimes — presumably those not involving guns? And then he told us how he really felt.

I have no trouble picking a side in the feud between Dan Harmon and Chevy Chase. (Team Harmon, in case that wasn't immediately clear.) But inevitably, it doesn't matter: Chase did some things, Harmon said some things, Chase said some things back. Maybe they're both at fault, in which case I should probably be writing a more measured analysis of their beef.

Looks like Chevy Chase and Community creator Dan Harmon are embroiled in a good ol' fashioned Hollyweirdo fight. I guess Dan told Chevy his wife is fat or something and then Chevy responded in the best way he knew how: with words, venomous, powerful words.

Venerable New York Times crossword editor Will Shortz was recently schooled on the meaning of "Illin'," sending shockwaves through the close-knit puzzler community. He's learned his lesson, if Sunday's crossword puzzle is any indication.

I'm going to go with a resounding YES. I don't have the energy to fact check the entire thing, but something tells me this line at 1:52 might not actually be true: "When your obese brothers and sisters get stuck on the stairway on 9/11 preventing fit people from getting through and surviving you make it part of my business."

Hopefully, people. Hopefully.

When freelance writer Julieanne Smolinski noticed what she thought was an error in Saturday's New York Times crossword puzzle (PDF), she shot off an email to the corrections line. To her surprise, the Times' crossword puzzle editor responded, and the Great New York Times Crossword Puzzle Illin' Debate was born.

Democracy is like a pungent onion for weepy Republican Speaker-of-the-House-to-be (ugh) John Boehner. Remember that time he broke down about the health care bill? Nancy Pelosi thinks John Boehner is an immature crybaby.

Homophobic preacher Eddie Long—accused of all sorts of naughty, gross things—took to the pulpit of his megachurch, saying he'll fight everything: "I feel like David against Goliath, but I've got five rocks and I haven't thrown one yet."

Red state rabble rouser Sarah Palin—who only recently discovered the joy of language—took to Sean Hannity's radio show today to rant about the "impotent, limp, and gutless reporters" who "slay" her.

Sarah Palin hit Fox News Sunday to throw her support behind Arizona in its fight over the immigration law, adding that her pal Governor "Jan Brewer has the cojones that our President does not have" to deal with immigration.

Before a Cannes Film Festival press screening for Ridley Scott's soon-to-be-released blockbuster adaptation of Robin Hood, the movie's star, Russell Crowe, shared some thoughts on whom he thinks the heroic outlaw would steal from were he a real person living in the year 2010.

Sick and tired of being pushed around, called a terrorist illegal alien, the anti-Christ, and Stalin-Hitler-Mao, the president has decided to go on the offensive against his loudest critics. It's time for some DC mudslinging!

President Barack Obama weighed in today on the chaos going down in Iran tonight via released statement. The message to the ruling government is pretty clear: you're going about this the wrong way, and you need to stop. Right now.