We know it's been bugging you. Why can't the Times have freelancers and stringers who are as ethical as its staff reporters? (Because Times staffers are always paragons of ethics, right, David Pogue?) But now there's no more need to worry, kids. A mere three years after the Jayson Blair scandal broke, and a lickety-split year after the Siegal Committee delivered its report, the paper is pleased to announce its finally figured out how to ensure freelancers' integrity. Effective today, all Times freelancers and stringers won't be allowed to work for that paper until they have — of all onerous burdens — completed a questionnaire.

One freelancer was troubled by Monday's anointment of Conde Nast as the company that treated her sort best in 2005. "Was this posted as a joke," she asked. Flummoxed freelancer then forwarded this tale:

Sometimes it pays to fabulously frivolous. Conde Nast was ranked the top company for New York City's freelancers, according to a survey released today by The Freelancers Union. 1,000 people were asked to vote on the one company that treated them the best of those they worked for in 2005; not surprisingly, the money-throwers at Conde Nast came out on top. The rest of the list includes:

• Wireless-entertainment provider Kargo Global sues Cargo magazine for copyright infringement. Also, one imagines, for poor newsstand. [Mediaweek]
• Freelancers often go without health insurance. Who knew? [MetroNY]
• Are Americans getting growing tired of celeb news? God we hope not. [Economist]
• Time Inc. EIC John Huey — who ousted Jim Seymore to install Rick Tetzeli as Entertainment Weekly's editor a few years ago, is now jumping back in to shuffle Tetzeli's top editorial ranks after a crappy 2005. [NYP (second item)]

Here's one you won't find on Gawker Jobs:

Writer Bill Schulz visited the set of gore flick Hostel for a Stuff magazine assignment; short on extras, the movie crew started grabbing anyone available for some blood-soaked scenes. Lucky for Bill, he had the chops to nab a plum role as the recipient of a testical-removal.

• Bikini-clad Ricky Martin and his friend aren't gay. They just fuck like they are. [Dlisted]
• Now that Peter Braunstein has been caught, we can go back to freely discussing pantyhose. [Slate]
• Federal anti-terror funds pay for faux-fancy Circle Line dinner cruises. Terrorists do balk at the sight of old white people wearing Sperry Top-Siders. [NYP]
• The year in crappy celebrity wrist watches. [OAN]
• The year in odd news. [MSNBC]
• The year in random freelancers who happen to appear on Jeopardy. [FishbowlNY]
• Get the cool gadget and games your relatives didn't get you for Christmas or Hanukkah with Gizmodo and Kotaku's holiday gift guides. Click on the Best of the Year polls to choose the top gadget and game of the year, and maybe score a $500 gift certificate. Get to it, nerds. [Gizmodo]
• And finally, we end on a very serious note: Kevin Federline has launched his own website. It is a thing of mysterious, painful beauty, built from the ashes of dead souls and flecked with the vomit of those who manage to survive its launch. [Kevin Federline]

• Many of you know CBS Early Show anchor Julie Chen as the wife of CBS showboat Les Moonves. But she has another talent: The ability to pull an insipid catchphrase out of her ass. [TVgasm]
• If you're desperate for freelance, check out the opportunities at the forthcoming men's mag, Cotton Tales. It's guaranteed to give Details and Men's Vogue a run for their big, gay money. [Craigslist]
• Trying to curb curse words in media? Good fucking luck. Asking us to stop swearing is like asking Graydon Carter to start wearing a patch. [NYT]
• Is getting an Extreme Makeover from the ABC reality show worth dying for? In the case of these remarkably fragile women, the show's rejection might lead to suicide. And by might, we mean has. [Defamer]
• Does Times restaurant critic Frank Bruni know the muffin man? And, if so, does he have a thing for him? [Bruni Digest]