Today in totally benign apps Apple thinks it needs to protect us from: German electro-punk band Atari Teenage Riot has developed an app which plays crazy sounds. The German iTunes store has delayed its release because it might cause "hysteria."

Method Man is in the midst of a European tour. During his stop in Germany, his tour bus was robbed. Meth and his crew did what most logical people would: they went to the police station and reported the crime.

You'd think that any rationale human being would understand that Chatroulette on live television would be a bad idea... but you'd be wrong. Watch as this German TV show's Chatroulette segment quickly becomes a disaster.

[via YouTube]

[The growing population of wild boars in Europe has led German car club ADAC to conduct crash tests on simulated animals. Video after the jump. Pic via ADAC]

Moments ago in Berlin—and on live television—armed robbers raided the Hyatt hotel that was hosting a European Poker Tournament event and left with a reported €1 million. Inside, video of the panic that ensued as the robbery happened.

[Participants at the CeBit exhibition, the giant high-tech fair underway in Germany, remake a classic shot of a theater filled with bespectacled patrons. Image via Getty]

After London's smallish Obama on My Mind and Kenya's amateurish Obama: The Musical, Germany has finally created a true Barack Obama musical extravaganza with HOPE: Einer Neuen Generation. Palin has skanky back-up dancers and Reverend Wright sings angry gospel.

German reporter to Senator Jim Inhofe: "You're ridiculous."

Soccer (Football/Fútbol/Wootball/Whatever) is a game of strategy, skill, stamina, and hooliganism. It's also a game where German goalie Jens Lehmann had one too many Capri-Suns beforehand. Hey, when ya gotta go, ya gotta go.

Remember how the Post used to tease the Daily News with billboards, but now their mogul owners have instituted a "no criticizing the other guy" policy at both New York tabloids? German newspaper wars are way, way better.

In your ferocious Friday media column: Newspaper wars in Germany are of another breed, another high school paper censored for dumb reasons, more on the BusinessWeek layoffs, and George Stephanopoulos' fluff chops questioned.

In your thinly-spread Thursday media column: A vicious backbiting war amongst Birmingham's press corps, David Remnick still has money to spend, Germany looks to screw bloggers, and Bernie Kerik: Journalistic Hero.

[A controversial new art installation by Ottmar Hoerl opened yesterday in Straubing, Germany, with 1250 garden gnomes—most painted black, but several painted gold—giving the Nazi salute. Image via Getty]

[A shadow passes across a translucent screen of letter men at the 61st annual Frankfurt Book Fair in Germany, which started today. Image via Getty]

A group of German idiots seeking publicity for their movie staged a fake suicide bombing in a fake California town yesterday and tricked the German media into running with it. Kind of like the Coast Guard did with CNN today.

Germany apparently has quite the strict laws for when it comes to naming your children, and has recently taken a stand against "Peppermint," "Sputnik" and "Tom-Tom." But not "Jihad!"

Here is the German Economy Minister, Karl-Theodor zu Guttenberg, reading a fairy tale about the exchange rate to some children at the behest of "the German Center for Fairy Tale Culture." Ok, Germany! Can you imagine if Geithner did this?

So apparently Barack Obama and German Chancellor Angela Merkel have a frosty relationship, because Obama doesn't rub her back all the time or what-have-you. And that is why Obama went to Dresden, to "snub" Merkel, and to apologize for World War II.

[A police car drives through a gate during Rose Monday celebrations, Catholic Germany's version of Mardi Gras, in Cologne today; image via Getty]

It's good for a company to have a slogan that stands out. But it's bad for a company to have a slogan that stands out because it was also a concentration camp slogan.