As part of our ongoing inquiry into the filthy elite of New York's food and restaurant scene, today we present annotated Health Department report cards for the least sanitary restaurants that also have Michelin stars.

• Michelle Obama had lunch at Gramercy Tavern today; chaos ensued. [BB]
• The Jane Hotel drama continues: Apparently an article about the hotel/club's outraged neighbors was supposed to run in the Times last weekend, but the Jane's co-owner Richard Born managed to get the paper to quash it. [Curbed]
• Trader Joe's may be opening a location on Sixth Avenue and 21st St. [NYO]
• The competition between Greenhouse and Provocateur is heating up. [P6]
• Dean Poll sure is off to a great start: Union workers say they're planning to hold a rally outside Tavern on the Green on Friday afternoon. [Crain's]
• The lawsuit filed by ex-Masa employees for getting shafted out of the 20% service charge added to diners' tabs? A judge says it can move forward. [Eater]
• Guinness is celebrating its 250th birthday today. Cheers. [Serious Eats]

• Danny Meyer has tapped Gramercy Tavern's executive sous-chef, Nick Anderer, to run things at his new restaurant at the Gramercy Park Hotel. [GS]
• A roundup of restaurants already open or will be soon. [Eater]
• Greenpeace staged a demonstration inside Nobu on Saturday night. [NYT]
• More bad news for Giuseppe Cipriani: His Moscow expansion is a no-go. [P6]
• Pete Wentz's Angels & Kings was shuttered for serving minors. [Gawker]
• Frank Bruni isn't too impressed with the Obamas decision to eat at Blue Hill during their weekend jaunt to NYC: "In the very predictability of this choice, in its all-too-neat squaring with the officially sanctioned food agenda, in its absence of surprise or abandon, isn't it ever so slightly disappointing?" [NYT]

• You can't afford to eat there any more, but you'll be pleased to hear that Daniel is still a four-star restaurant, according to Frank Bruni, who says Adam Tihany's recent redesign is "genuinely gorgeous." [NYT]
• Jason Pomeranc's Thompson LES is opening a rooftop bar. [GS]
• Gramercy Tavern gives away free $24.07 gift cards, chaos ensues. [GS]
• Chocolate Bar is re-opening at a new location in the West Village. [NYO]
• Kevin Adey is taking over as chef at Park Slope's Bussaco. [TONY]
• Your Tony Bourdain rant o' the day: "Alice Waters annoys the living shit out of me... There's something very Khmer Rouge about [her]." [DCist via Eater]
• Spotted: Adam Platt's photo appears in Conde Nast Traveler. [Eater]

• Graydon Carter has backed out of hosting Vanity Fair's next Oscar party at Tom Colicchio's LA iteration of Craft because he doesn't like the Century City complex spot's "corporate feel." Laurent Tourondel's BLT on Sunset Strip will probably host the celeb-glutted affair instead. [P6]