I’ve started this letter five times and deleted it five times. Even though we’ve never met I’ve known you all my life. I learned you existed from a letter addressed to someone else. A few months ago, my mom told me you wanted to meet me along with my wife and son. I was surprised. I hear we have some things in common. You love Laphraoig and, like me, tend to overindulge in it. You are slow to recant an opinion. You’re an avid reader of political books, although I imagine our choices here likely differ. But I struggle to understand what meeting you would accomplish. In an earlier draft of this letter, I wrote that I forgave you. But I realized that I was writing what people want to hear in instances like this, not what I actually feel. How do you forgive a forty-year absence?

The leading age group of methamphetamine-related deaths in San Diego County? Baby Boomers, according to county records.

At 100 years old, there's no doubt that Scott Cleveland's grandmother has seen a lot of things, but the one thing she really wanted to see was her grandson's face underneath his dumb beard.

Even the sourest among us can probably muster some happy tears for this older man who just found out his life is about to change in the nicest way possible.

In what sounds like the start of either a charming Disney movie or a terrifying psychological horror story, a five-year-old Connecticut boy went on a bit of a detour when someone else's great-grandfather picked him up from school.

A grandfather in the United Kingdom picked up a child from a Kent school and took her to a doctor's appointment, then returned her to school later that day. Sounds like a heartwarming afternoon. Except that it was the wrong kid altogether.

Welcome to Thatz Not Okay, a regular column in which I school inquiring readers on what is and is not okay. Please send your questions to caity.weaver@gawker.com with the subject "Thatz Not Okay."

Mean old granny Patty Bigbee last week was arrested for allegedly trying to sell her grandson for $30K, after initially asking for $70K. Why would someone ever sell their grandson? So mom can get a new car, that's why.

A 45-year-old woman named Patty Bigbee was arrested yesterday with her boyfriend after they tried to sell her baby grandson for $75,000. After some haggling the buyer, an undercover police informant, got Bigbee to agree to $30,000.

After he rescued a drowning child, a local newspaper called "Craig Hemengway" a hero. His granny wrote them a letter: You spelled his name wrong, it's "Eric Hemenway." Turns out he's a wanted criminal, and may now go to jail.

Ohioan Richard Heritz was arrested earlier this month for smuggling marijuana into the Warren Correction Institution for an inmate. The thing is: Richard Heritz is 85. And the inmate who was supposed to receive the weed is his grandson, Gregory.

According to this Today Show investigative piece, Seniors are being scammed by incarcerated crooks pretending to be their snot-nosed Grandchildren. Oh humanity!

Grandparents: they hate their grandkids nowadays! It's all detailed right there in a brand new breaking trend story from the New York Times, the Paper of Record. Nobody likes anybody any more!