Does fish oil actually prevent heart disease? "By 2018, there will be an answer." Okay. Thanks for nothing.

Hot Pockets, a brand of garbage available in your grocer's freezer until this week's recall, apparently has many fans who share their love for the diseased-meat snacks on Twitter. But how many of these pre-recall Hot Pockets tweets ended in death?

Clogged arteries, or in scientist talk, "atherosclerosis," has long been associated with our modern, gluttonous ways, including our propensity for smoking and obesity. Americans, naturally, considered such diagnoses a matter of national pride, an example of their freedom to choose. But according to a recent study, this particular form of heart disease was relatively common thousands of years ago, with roughly one third of the ancient mummies examined showing signs of the disease.

Vampire bats! Healthcare law! Medical tattoo! Stroke depression! Backward legs! Spice fat! Organic poultry Deer coli! And rampant death in Somalia is sad, for a second! It's your Friday Health Watch, where we watch your health—while sucking!

On Valentine's Day, surgeons at the University of California San Diego performed the most romantic procedure possible: They installed a second heart in 36-year-old Tyson Smith's chest, so he could have "two hearts beat as one."

Even controlling for the fact that people who don't brush are more unhealthy, British scientists found that brushing your teeth twice a day reduces your risk of heart disease. Unlike all those bullshit cancer studies, this is real science. [SciAm]