Today is apparently National Grilled Cheese Sandwich Day, so it would be highly irresponsible of me not to direct your attention to this easy-to-salivate recipe for the life-completing Pizza Grilled Cheese from Blog Chef.

There was a 30 percent increase in complaints about "romance scams" last month, according to Western Union. A "romance scam" is where someone spends months and months having in-depth email conversations with you, and then gets you to send them money. Except for the lack of a proper couch, formal credentials, and some honesty, these scams sound a lot like psychological counseling. So why not reverse the scam?

Flight attendants are always, like, "I'm going to go ahead and check your bag" or "I'm going to need you to put up your tray table" or "We do have FAA rules on alcohol consumption to enforce, Mr. Tate." But why do they talk like that? Well, because it pays. Duh.

Britain's Daily Mail begins holiday heartbreak story with the quote, "We'll sell our toys to pay for daddy's funeral," and the Dickensian drama just builds from there: Mounting debts; the looming prospect of home eviction; and little details like these:

Yahoo will lay off around 700 employees today, All Things Digital reports. Fired workers will have to leave their buildings immediately. A security escort is a terrible Christmas present — especially since Yahoo gave the same gift two years ago.

Some people are awesome at picking just the right gifts for friends and loved ones. Others just suck at presents. For the latter group, Brooklyn e-tailer Etsy invented a brilliant mashup of Facebook and the twee crafts it sells.

Santa Claus was reported to be "devastated" after he was fired by San Francisco Macy's, where he'd been well regarded for more than 20 Christmases. Apparently Santa, who in everyday life disguises himself as "John Toomey," told a naughty joke.

"Why is Crate & Barrel selling Goatee Hitler?" a reader asks. Well, CB2 is the "hip" C&B spinoff, which would explain why the Führer-esque grim expression and bowl haircut are paired with a goatee. But orange? So not Adolf's color.

A PhD student in New Zealand has invented an internet "bot" to automatically shower him with gifts by buying cheap items in online auctions. Because computer friends, you see, do not forsake you.

Remember how you used to have a few hours of airplane peace before handling crushing family holiday obligations? Google has taken care of that for you again this year, bringing back its free airline Wi-Fi.

That's it, we're calling a wrap on 2009. Please talk among yourselves on #crosstalk. Also: MisterHippity is hosting a Jersey Shore liveblog at 9pm; tomorrow Azaria and Foster will be around to nurse you through your hangover.

New Year's Eve is so deadly, just walking can kill you. [NYT]

Writes the tipster who spotted the typo currently on NYPost.com: "If only 'Michael Jackson' were easy to spell, like 'Tiger Woods.'" Which is funny, except practically no one is working in media today, including here — expect light posting.

Conde Nast's beautiful holiday gift this year: a $15 gift card to the Conde Nast cafeteria. Oh, you really shouldn't have!

Commenters on Reddit.com banded together to create the largest secret santa gift exchange ever attempted, with 5,000 global participants, three times the prior world record. Even more amazing, the gifts were not entirely terrible!

CORRECTION: This post originally referenced the INXS Need You Tonight video, which was partly animatd. Clearly, A-Ha's "Take On Me" is the closer analogy. Gawker regrets the miscalibrated pop culture reference.

After John Carney issued his annual holiday list of girls to avoid, blogger and editor Melissa Lafsky offered up her response: a catalog of guys that women must avoid at all costs. This originally appeared on her blog Opinionista.

When he's not covering Wall Street for Clusterstock or opining for provacative trend stories, John Carney likes to catalog the kind of ladies guys should not date. Melissa Lafsky has issued a riposte.

Yahoo has indeed canceled this year's iteration of its infamous year-end bacchanal, a spokesperson for the internet conglomerate told us, confirming our earlier post. There will instead be "department/location based events... in line with industry norms." Norms=boring. (Pic)

At Yelp, every review is a chance for free drinks, every email a chance for distasteful punning — and every company party a chance to leer, spank and orgy out. Judging from the pictures, 2009's holiday bash was no exception.