Accuweather.com is already sounding the alarm about next week's "Groundhog Day Storm" that could affect "more than 100 million people… from the Rockies to the Plains, South, Midwest and Northeast." Sounds scary! But not nearly as scary as their maps.

Let's laugh at something a congressman recently said about gay marriage, yes? Because Rep. Steve King, a notable jackass, has a theory: Under legalized gay marriage, children would be raised collectively in "warehouses," a la Ancient Sparta, effectively ending civilization.

Ute Linhart (pictured) was waiting in the 28th street R train station platform Wednesday night when a crazy man pushed her into the path of an oncoming train. She suffered serious injuries, but survived. Is this good PR, or what?

Behold, the blurb that launched a thousand mocking blog posts: "Very rarely, a few times in a lifetime, you open a book and when you close it nothing can ever be the same..." Book blurbs: Old media's version of linkbaiting.

Celebrity publicists are definitely busy. They're often liars. Sometimes they try to control media coverage. But are they really a "dark breed of fixers, stuntsters and arch media manipulators"? Do Hollywood flacks count as "an invisible army of Machiavellian schemers"? No, they're more like a very visible army of bumbling media whores and hustlers. But the Times UK has several even more exaggerated descriptions of the prowess of idiot flacks. This story's hyperbole makes it the stupidest article ever written about PR, which threatens to destroy the media forever:

Bonnie Fuller, who oversees Star magazine and is therefore the arbiter of American media standards, has a question about this whole Miley Cyrus thing, and its connection to the current Texas polygamy scandal: "Is it OK to sexualize a fifteen-year-old if it is in the pages of a high falutin' magazine and her parents seem OK with it? Or is this really not much different from parents in a cult acquiescing to having their teen daughters wedded and bedded?" Ummm... can we say 'No' to all of the above?

Jeffrey Chodorow, the owner of Kobe Club, China Grill, Wild Salmon, Borough and many other so-so restaurants, has divulged his five-year plan to grow his gimmicky restaurant empire to the Observer's Doree Shafrir. Soon, it seems, New Yorkers will be wandering past whole blocks full of restaurants that Jeffrey Chodorow—and perhaps he alone—thinks are good ideas. A Maxim steakhouse, a Malaysian-themed coffeehouse, and yet another "American steakhouse concept" at the Empire Hotel are all in the works. And there's more! Woah! Also: Yipes!