Gamergate is substantively about nothing; ask a hundred of its angry, anonymous backers what it's fighting for, and you'll get a hundred different, zany answers. But a few internet opportunists are using the chaos to make themselves celebrities.

Conservatives want you to know they're simply telling an inconvenient truth about the bad behavior of U.S. soldier Bowe Bergdahl and the Obama administration's effort to get him back from Taliban captivity. It's also a truth that's 180 degrees from the truth they tweeted lo, these many years ago!

Police in India just filed rape and assault charges against the editor of a liberal magazine, Tehelka — a publication known for its anti-corruption, pro-transparency angle, that recently called for Indians to address the country's problems with sexual violence.

Celebrate the International Press Freedom Awards next week at a ceremony chaired by Bloomberg CEO Daniel Doctoroff, whose news organization reportedly spiked a major investigation into the finances of the Chinese oligarchy and suspended a reporter suspected of complaining about it, for fear of offending China's rulers.

Michelle Rhee, the controversial former head of DC's public schools, won't admit her child goes to private school.

When we last checked in with Scott DesJarlais, the distinguished U.S. rep from Tennessee's 4th district pictured here with an un-aborted child, he had been recorded in 2000 pressuring his mistress into having an abortion. This was notable because DesJarlais — who was elected back in 2010 thanks to support from an antiquated movement called "the Tea Party" — is virulently anti-choice. Here, he says so on his website:

World's fittest man Paul Ryan is in a bit of ideological trouble today after it was revealed that the congressman lied about requesting a stimulus package. Just yesterday Ryan told ABC's Cincinatti affiliate:

As CEO of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg forced everyone's hidden friend lists into public view. As a user of Google Plus, Mark Zuckerberg just decided to hide his own friends. Double standard, much?

Boston businessman Wayne Chang claims that the Winklevoss twins elbowed him out of the $65 million settlement Facebook paid them back in 2008. Chang partnered with the Winklevii on their failed ConnectU project—the idea they claim Mark Zuckeberg stole and turned into Facebook— and he says this entitles him to a portion of the ginormous settlement, of which he currently has $0.

The Associated Press has huffily declined to cover tonight's Fox News Channel GOP "debate" in South Carolina on the grounds that Fox won't let it take photographs during the debate—only before and after. But it does cover presidential addresses under precisely the same conditions.

Google CEO Eric Schmidt once famously proclaimed that today's kids might all need to change their names to escape their embarrassing Internet trail. What about tech CEOs? A new book reveals Schmidt tried, and failed, to scrub his own Google results.

New Orleans pastor Grant Storms was arrested for indecency after being caught punching the Pope in a park. Storms harassed partiers at gay festival Southern Decadence for decades. Now he's calling himself a "hypocrite." He beat us to it!

This evening's Piers Morgan Tonight featured megachurch pastor Joel Osteen and his Stepford wife Victoria. When Morgan switched the subject to homosexuality, Osteen—declaring it a "sin" and comparing it to an "addiction"—contradicted and offended on multiple levels.

Julian Assange's lawyers are demanding an investigation into how embarrassing police reports about his sex crime cases were leaked to The Guardian, calling it a smear campaign. Wikileaks' leaks = transparency. Other people's leaks = smear campaigns. Got it?

New Jersey pastor Cedric Miller banned Facebook from his church because of its many carnal temptations. Miller knows about carnal temptations! In 2003 he admitted to having a threesome with his wife and a male church assistant. (via Christian Nightmares)

New York's tyrannical mayor Michael Bloomberg, after winning his third term, now strongly supports an NYC ballot measure to restore the two-term limit. The explanation: "A spokesman says Bloomberg only supported three terms for himself, because the situation was extraordinary."

Mayor Mike Bloomberg likes junk food, just not for poor people. He's gone to war against salt and soda, but his company's office remains stocked with goodies: "We have all the junk in the world up there," one employee says.

Puffy, halo-haired hypocrite xenophobe Lou Dobbs is absolutely outraged that The Nation would correctly report that he employed illegal immigrants as workers at his various palatial estates. What—do they want Lou Dobbs to start racial profiling?

The immutable laws of universal karma dictated that this would happen: former CNN shouting head Lou Dobbs, America's most prominent anti-immigrant xenophobe, had illegal immigrants working for him.

The Atlantic's Marc Ambinder, while fielding questions about his recent revelation that ex-RNC chair and Bush campaign manager Ken Mehlman is gay, has dropped another interesting nugget: Mehlman claims to be a virgin.