Between this morning's tragic mass shooting in Webster, the news that thousands have hijacked a federal petitioning system in order to demand the deportation of a journalist exercising his right to free speech on the subject of gun control, and the death of a surfer who selflessly rescued six of his neighbors from certain doom during Hurricane Sandy, it's easy to forget that not everything sucks.

Well, how about that: Turns out the homophobes were right all along. Letting gay people get married really does lead to dog-on-kangaroo make out sessions!