Mary Thorn is great friends with her pet alligator, Rambo. She loves Rambo and Rambo loves her. Don’t let the government take Rambo away from Mary!

A two-year-old bear was seen at the University of Colorado Boulder today just minding its damn business (as bears do), hanging in a tree (as bears do), when authorities were called in to bring the little buddy back to its natural habitat. That bear was not enrolled in college—he is only a bear.

If you know some art directors, you know this sounds accurate. If you don't know any art directors, well, now you know they have small dicks. (Allegedly).[Copyranter. Click to enlarge]

Oh look, a beer company has employed the advertising tactic of "Blonde girl showing her breasts," in order to make you, the consumer, amenable to purchasing beer. The breast-revealing ad is on YouTube! But for how long? NSFW thing below:

Pussy™ Energy Drink: "Pussy is a 100% natural drink. No nasty chemicals and nothing manufactured."Pussy is Jonnie Shearer's vision. He set up from his bedroom at 21 and launched in June 2004." You can't go wrong, copywriting-wise. Pussy's not available in America, sadly. [Here, via Copyranter]