Is bro-blogger Tucker Max's movie as chest-thumpingly awful as the script made it out to be? Based on some "leaked" footage we've been sent, yes, yes it is. Sex with midgets and deaf girls; wannabe-alpha-male trash talk; it's all there.

Connecticut Senator Chris Dodd has prostate cancer. He'll have surgery early next month and be back at work, his office says, in September. And he is still seeking reelection in 2010.

OK! magazine wanted to drum up sales with this cover about Jessica Simpson's weight loss. When Us Weekly ran the same basic cover, it was their best-selling cover of 2007 — the same year, incidentally, OK! found Jessica's "new" body.

Julie Powell blogged her way through cooking every recipe in Julia Child's Mastering the Art of French Cooking; a book deal and movie followed. Are food bloggers thrilled for her? Hardly; Powell is a foodie infidel who must be stopped.

On the Late Show With David Letterman last night, Katie Couric told the story of how Michael Jackson asked her out on a date in 2000 (two years after her husband died), using Rabbi Shmuley Boteach as a go-between.

That is not one of our "jokey"-style headlines! Rather it is a quite accurate summation of the true state of affairs in the world. Tanning beds will give you cancer for sure, scientists say. Adios, Jersey.

Under almost any circumstance, it would be highly unfair to compare NYT managing editor for news Jill Abramson's new "Puppy Diaries" column to Joan Didion's masterpiece essay "Slouching Towards Bethlehem." Unless Abramson asks us to.

Remember how Sarah Palin graduated from her fiftieth college with a degree in communications? What the hell happened to addle this woman's mind so much that she can no longer form logical sentences? We went to the tapes to investigate.

Aspray your butt. Why have a stank butt, or stank privates? Aspray them. The odors disappear. As this commercial that's really been running on TV emphasizes: Aspray is safe for your butt, and privates. Click to watch. [via Adfreak]

Apparently she calls into a local talk radio station all the time. In this clip, she is talking about aliens. Also she predicts Armageddon in 95 years.

Here's a shocker: According to a tipster, American Apparel's pervy madman CEO, Dov Charney, is demanding the firing of employees he deems unattractive and thus detrimental to the "AA aesthetic," as he feels they may be hurting his bottom line.

Have you seen the viral video of the wedding party from Minnesota dancing down the aisle to their nuptials? Well, they went on The Today Show and recreated it. How awkward was it? And has Chris Brown's career been saved?

By lashing the Cambridge police for arresting Henry Louis Gates at home, the president seems to have upset basically everyone today, even supporters on the left. But at least Republican rage isn't aimed at health care!

A hedge fund is the worst possible place to get embroiled in a workplace sexual harassment suit. Hedge funders are ruthless and insane. A harassment suit at one hedge fund is now also an extortion case. With nude pixxx!

This has the suspicious whiff of a setup: Star reporter Kate Major and Octo-dad Jon Gosselin very publicly become an "item." Star trumpets this fact in a press release. Hours later, Kate Major resigns. Why?

Just after announcing it would bring in McKinsey & Co. for some horrific cost-cutting, Conde Nast has released its official projections for its crucial September ad sales. We knew the numbers would be bad; they lived up to expectations.

Surely you've read the Twitter works of noted wordsmith Sarah Palin and wondered to yourself, "How does she string together such poetry so effortlessly?" Very, very slowly!

OMG, Gossip Girl was filming right outside our offices today!! We sent intern geniuses Whitney Jefferson and Cassie Seale down to film the teen girl madness. Video whizkid Mike Byhoff edited it together. The girls... they've gone wild! And gossipy!

Look, it is a scandalously explicit blowjob-oriented advertisement for the Sprite beverage! But wait, Twitterererers: this is a spec ad. What's a spec ad? A sexy one.