Bernie Madoff has just been sentenced to 150 years in prison for running the biggest Ponzi scheme in history. It was the maximum sentence the judge could have given him.

Today one of the biggest stars in the history of the world died. How did the internet's self-proclaimed "Queen of all Media" respond? By accusing Michael Jackson of faking the whole thing.

Love flourishes, with the help of the internet! Are you an intensely sexual, spiritual, non-Scientologist goddess, searching for a meditative high school physics teacher for true love? Hare Krishna prostitutes a plus! The most romantic website ever is here:

Last year women spent almost $50 million on worthless products that failed to get rid of cellulite. Stop the madness! Must the New York Times plaster an entire Styles page with a naked bottom to get you to listen? Yes.

What will Anderson Cooper be doing tonight? Unvogue Magazine says he'll be attending a party at the Sapphire Go-Go Lounge for their men's issue. It's been informally dubbed "Anderson Cooper's Big Fat Coming Out Party." [UPDATED: AC's denial below]:

Yesterday we told you Kodak was offering $5000 to anyone who could track down the boy with the rose who was shunned by Megan Fox recently. Well it looks as though one of our readers found him—On Facebook!

Jenny Sanford, wife of cheating South Carolina governor Mark Sanford, released her statement about his Argentinian affair, explaining that the reason she had no idea where he was this past week is because she kicked him out of the house.

As previously rumored, Katie Holmes and her dashing space bride Tom Cruise might be moving to New York permanently. (As permanent as movie stars move, anyway). The Village Voice thinks they may have tracked down their new pad.

We smelled a story when we read that Bo's favorite food is tomatoes, but we had no idea how deep it went. Not long after we started sniffing it out the whole tissue of lies unraveled.

Last night we heard that Jon Gosselin, the maritally-troubled* costar of Jon & Kate Plus 8, might be looking for a Trump Towers Place sex pad. Now a resident of said building has provided us with more details:

That's Mr. Romance 2009 doing the cover-shoot for romance novel The Lord of Devil Isle (which will eventually probably look something like this). Don't ask how we found this. But there's a whole slideshow and it's disturbing, but fascinating.

Che Guevara's granddaughter Lydia has graciously decided to start a "vegetarian revolution" by posing for PETA with "the torso naked, covered only by a sling loaded with carrots as bullets." Good for her! As Che himself once said:

Michelle Obama has a green thumb. Matt Drudge has a rotten, black thumb, so he doesn't buy Obama's garden-harvesting photo-op, because she only planted it 89 days ago and what kind of garden grows that fast?

To be fair, a personality disorder is not the sort of thing that just takes care of itself overnight. Still, in an interview with the Washington Post, shamed horndog mill-worker's-son John Edwards sounds kinda self-important, still.

If you're going to spend $255 on crib for your spawn, you might as well do it ironically, right?

On Facebook, 439 people said they might drop by the Ed Sullivan Theater today to demand that CBS dump David Letterman for sexually assaulting telling a bad joke about Sarah Palin's daughter. Approximately 400 of those people are liars.

President Obama was doing an interview with CNBC today when a pesky fly started buzzing around, interrupting the proceedings. So, without missing a beat, Obama employed his stealth ninja reflexes and handily dispatched the pest. Watch and be in awe.

We support the idea that kids should eat healthy food. Theoretically. But when it involves a crazy mom ranting against birthday cupcakes and battling Girl Scout cookies, we must demur. Meet MeMe Roth, publicist and food Nazi mother:

Now this is some sort of karma: a report says that the state of California is going after RadarOnline for exploiting Octomom's kids, with their relentless Octomom videos. [UPDATED below]

The free world has been protesting North Korea's 12-year prison sentence of Current journalists Laura Ling and Euna Lee as unjust and outrageous. How embarrassing! Now the women have admitted their vile crimes. According to North Korea's official news agency.