In your wet Wednesday media column: Peter Chernin assembling a secret empire, John Carney gets a new job, pay TV is far from dying, Jon Meacham meets Steven Rattner, and Vanity Fair joins the electronic age.

All they need now is a pipe bomb, and they will never be scooped again. Tom & Jerry's is a dive bar near our office. It's also "Elaine's for the glittering digital set," "where everyone knows your Twitter handle."

In your copacetic Thursday media column: a Russian tycoon buys a British paper, a new NYT White House correspondent, John Carney is let go, and newspapers in general had the worst year everrrrrrr last year.

John Carney faced an unruly mob; Courtney Reimer faced an extraordinary financial statement; and Shane Richmond faced crazy musicians. The Twitterati could not be predictably rattled.

When he's not covering Wall Street for Clusterstock or opining for provacative trend stories, John Carney likes to catalog the kind of ladies guys should not date. Melissa Lafsky has issued a riposte.

A car chase failed to end on camera, making MSNBC's David Shuster sad; Ben Stiller hobnobbed merrily with Lance Armstrong; and a blogger became fascinated with Lydia Hearst's fulsome... theories in financial regulation. The Twitterati were excitable today.

John Carney, editor of the readable financial news and gossip site Dealbreaker (founded by original Gawker Elizabeth Spiers), is leaving to edit a new, similar site from Silicon Alley Insider called "ClusterStock." Caroline Waxler, formerly at MainStreet.com, will be heading up fellow SAI blog the Business Sheet. SAI itself is losing its managing editor Peter Kafka, who will be starting a new media and advertising blog for AllThingsD. And wrestling champ Alex "Blue States Lose" Blagg is leaving his blogging gig at BestWeekEver. See, jobs exist!

Mahalo founder Jason Calacanis will host a dinner at New York Chinese restaurant Golden Unicorn tonight. He's calling it Dim Sum 2.0. I'm going, but not for the lazy susan full of food. The last time Calacanis hosted one of these during a trip to New York, it was the night after Calacanis and DealBreaker blogger John Carney nearly came to blows. At the end of a fundraiser for Mouse, Carney allegedly told Calacanis "I will #&%$!ing drop you to the floor." The pair didn't come to blows, but maybe they just needed a little encouragement?