A magician named John Cassidy—world record holder for "most balloon sculptures made in one hour"—visited Michelle Obama at the White House last month. She promptly imprisoned him in a latex bubble, while a White House photographer documented her chilling disregard for the civil liberties of balloon magicians.

Why is everyone so damn worked up bike lanes, those green strips of pavement that have been popping up all over New York (and causing disputes) in the past few years? A New Yorker scribe is virulently opposed to them, and now everyone seems opposed to him.