Oct. 18 @ 1pm At the Northface store on W. 73nd and Broadway. He stood around while she shopped and then he paid for her items. [Post your own Gawker Stalker sightings or send them to stalker@gawker.com]

So! They're not Jon and Kate Gosselin or Richard Heene and Co. But! Today is Michael Chabon day at the New York Times. A book, reviewed, and a two-page Styles profile! In which we learn: they factcheck with their kids?

Jon and Kate Gosselin completely suck at life. Michael Jackson was weird on The Simpsons. Weird! Weirdos will get off on Marge Simpson in Playboy. Carrey Mulligan? Emmy Rossum! Pervy Dr. Phil, many more. Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

What is today, America? Lo, it's the day when Jon and Kate Gosselin make their big announcement on the reality show they have, with their kids, on the TV. This could save gossip magazines! We rank the possibilities, below.

A child of Jon and Kate Gosselin is injured after an unsuccessful sacrificial offering to Nielsen gods by TLC. Madonna's child caper! Susan Boyle: distraught. Harry Potter and Radiohead? Yeezey's girlfriend! Presenting your Sunday morning gossip roundup. Happy Father's Day!

Jon and Kate are packing legal heat, now; so is Evan Dando, and Kobe Bryant's maid, which finally gives TMZ the opportunity to teach readers about legislative law. Also, Marilyn Manson and Nazi Pubes. Your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

Are you sick of Jon and Kate Gosselin? Probably. But that's not going to stop the media from writing about them. They apparently just discovered the story, and in a room in Minnesota, news types are wringing their hands over missing it for so long.