It does not take Claude Lévi-Strauss to explain why the above video of an elderly man — perhaps Peruvian, but "facts" about viral videos seem generally to be moving targets so don't quote me on that — is being shared by distant relatives of yours and mine all over Facebook. We are smack in the middle of a week where every other news story is about dead bodies and the condition thereof, and few Facebook walls have been left untarnished by a proxy war over the Middle East. Would that we could all just shut up and dance this week away.

A dad filmed 25 years of Christmas mornings.

The important thing to remember about out-of-office replies is that no one is ever happy to receive them. An out-of-office reply is your way of saying, to anyone who emails with a request, "You're out of luck, motherfucker – I'M GONE." Use them to list the dates you'll be gone and the name of an alternate contact person. Do not use them to trick people into reading all about your exciting life.

Mark this day on your calendars, people. Today is the day that Elisabeth Hasselbeck agreed with Joy Behar on The View. And it was about Sarah Palin, too! Up is down! Black is white! Cake is pie! What's going on!?!?