Everything about today's Joyce Wadler and Abby Aguire's "Who Invited the Dog?" in today's Times is incredible. Including: "Ari Henry Barnes, who works in a New York law firm, is so devoted to his cat, Romeo, that he wipes the animal's behind every time he does 'a stinky boom boom.'" And: "A legion of two animal experts interviewed agreed that taking an unexpected animal to a party is impolite." [NYT]
Yikes! Joyce Wadler unloads on the Times blogs about 9/11 stories: "The thing about these 9/11 stories, they seem to me to have become war stories, entertainments, the thing you trot out at a dinner party. What will it be, the time Mel Gibson told me to buzz off in New Zealand, or the one about standing there with the guy whose girlfriend was trapped watching the towers collapse? Not that I can bear talking about the towers. Too painful. O.K., twist my arm. I'll whip right along as fast as I can to the bodies, because that's what everybody wants, in the movies or in life, the bodies."
• Breaking! Lloyd Grove not a fucking idiot so much as we might have thought! Writes Daily News slave Karin Henry, "To be fair to Lloyd, today s fucking idiocy can be laid at my feet. My brain said 'Walk the Line,' but my fingers said 'Ring of Fire.' Call it a brain fart, mental hemorrhoid or the ass-related metaphor of your choice. If Lloyd can take it like a man, so can I. Even though I m not."
• Hey, what's former Boldface Names gal, our auntie Joyce Wadler, been up to? We mean, besides sticking Candy Corns up her nose... [NYT]
• Best Post headline since, well, yesteday: "Mazel Toughs." Related: Why didn't the Warriors feature a Hasidic gang? [NYP]
• Sex machines. Literally. [Nerve]
• iPods are kinda like Rosa Parks, except white? No, seriously, we don't know what Apple was trying to do here, but it ain't working. [Apple]
• If you're so self-loathing as to sleep with someone named "Scooter," you're probably pathetic enough to stay with him through any forthcoming indictments. [Radar]
• Meghan O'Rourke fights for your right to get intellectually and physically laid. [Slate]
Mayor Bloomberg's girlfriend arrived at the Academy's Oscar party at Le Cirque wearing a long navy sheath dress with spaghetti straps. "It's a Morgane Le Fay," she tells the NYT's Joyce Wadler. She remarks, of the Oscars, "It's an important industry for this country, and it's great to have something people can think about and look at in this time when there's so much strife in the world." Then, "Please get the name of the [dress] designer in your article."
Oh, no! Now he's offended Joan Collins! [NYT]
The NYT's Joyce Wadler discovers celebrity hipsters at Chloe Sevigny's screening of Elia Kazan's America, America at the Tribeca Grand: "Pouring into the TriBeCa Grand's plush screening room to watch the film...were an invited crowd of socialites. Also attending were Ms. Sevigny's personal guests, who favored an urban biker look and had apparently never been coached by their mothers about looking pleased to be invited, even if you are not." The appearance of disaffectation and rugged urbanity (as opposed to rugged urbaneness) are actually part of The Look.
In Greece, apparently, no history of screenings [NYT]
Ah, the life of a "Broadway dame"! The drama! The intrigue! The harrowing dilemmas! The NYT's Joyce Wadler reports:
[Wadler to a group of "dames"]: Are you the ladies who lunch?
"No," Ms. Stritch said, "We're the ladies who don't lunch."
Ms. Bergen, missing that, started talking about a recent lunch.
Ms. Stritch interrupted.
"I was invited to luncheon at Le Cirque last Friday. I couldn't go. I had a CAT scan. That's the only thing I'd rather not do than have lunch."
"I can't stand them," Ms. Bergen said.
Jeremy's leather jacket says 'born to sorta sing' [NYT]
Lunch vs. CAT scan: lunch wins [Googlefight.com]
The NYT's Joyce Wadler, who did the best Hilton sisters interview I've seen yet, ran the first-ever NYT blind item last week. The target? Gossip columnist Michael Gross. ("What local ink-stained columnist had his publicist call around to say copies of his unauthorized biography of a top American fashion designer would be distributed in the street, after the designer's show on Friday?") Doesn't it seem a little too meta when gossip columnists are writing about gossip columnists in their gossip columns? It's like having gossipy gossip growing out of your gossip. Not that we're complaining, necessarily.
Times goes blind [Observer]
