This is not just a list of media people we don't like. Nor is it just a list of media people who had a bad year. This is a list of media people who—abundant evidence shows—should not be in the media, any more. Give it up. Try something else. (We'll even make a suggestion.) You've given it a shot. It's not working any more. The media is not for you.
In your mordant Friday media column: Judith Miller critiques someone else's journalism, the Occupy Wall Street Journal is coming, the NYO begs for a raise, Slate redesigns, and Jill Abramson wants questions from you.
In your tendentious Tuesday media column: Judith Miller gets a new job, James Murdoch accused of deception, the NYT poaches from the WSJ, Jill Abramson's introductory memo, and organic Thai asparagus journalism.
Here are a couple of pundits on Fox News Watch, trashing fellow Fox News commentator Sarah Palin's reality show during a commercial break. Conservative columnist Liz Trotta and Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist Judith Miller do not like the show at all!
Judy Miller: whatever happened to her? Apparently she is summarizing the final report of a "bipartisan commission," for FoxNews.com. Obama got an "F" in saving us from hypothetical aluminum tubes or something. (Ahmed Chalabi, you may be interested to know, is a bigwig in Iraqi government, and still has his friends in high places.)
Happy Sixth Anniversary of the War in Iraq! Sort of! The war began on March 20, 2003, Baghdad time, so we're totally not late. Let's look back at the lies!
Attention Americans, it's almost time to travel to your local movie theater to take in Nothing But the Truth, the ironically-titled Hollywood dramatization of the Judy Miller story! Miller, the former NYT correspondent (now with Fox!) who went to jail unnecessarily to protect Scooter Libby's right to plant fake stories with her concerning nonexistent Iraqi WMDs, is reportedly pleased with the film because it captures the "moral ambiguity" of her situation. It did so by casting Kate Beckinsale as (the much older) Miller, then "dramatizing" the story in order to make her a heroic, martyred "devoted mother of a seven-year-old" who "faces starker physical and personal consequences in jail." So, just how Judith Miller sees herself! Click through to watch two clips, exclusively featuring people who are far too attractive to be journalists:
Hooray for Judith Miller! After years in the wilderness, she's finally come home. The former star New York Times national security correspondent is heading to Fox News as an on-air analyst and general sad embarrassment. Miller became famous when she went to jail in a grandstanding stunt because she refused to admit that her secret source was Scooter Libby even though Libby had signed a waiver authorizing her to testify about their conversations and then there was some poetry exchanged and eventually she quit the Times in disgrace and they wrote a caged Editors Note about how she lied, incessantly, in the run-up to the war in Iraq, which was sold to Americans using bullshit planted in her articles by people from the office of the Vice President and then cited by Vice President Cheney. In other words, no one likes her. So now she's going to be on Fox in their new glorious Democrats-are-in-charge-again rebirth as the loyal opposition to the terrorists who will run the country in 2009. They are sooo lucky to have her! Since she left the Times she's been with the Manhattan Institute, a conservative think thank, because she's given up entirely on getting anyone to like her or take her seriously anymore. Also she endorsed Barack Obama because why not? She probably believes in abortion and socialism and progressive taxation just as much as she believed that Iraq was a dangerous threat based on the most specious and misleading of evidence. For a while all the "serious" media liberals had to acknowledge that Bush was more "serious" about National Security than those peacenik hippie Nation-reading commies, remember? No, no one remembers, or cares, whatever. Miller is of course either delusional or just doesn't give a shit:
Ken Layne over at Wonkette has done some heroic digging into Plum Island, the Department of Homeland Security-run animal horror lab suspiciously close not only to Montauk, where our friend Monty washed ashore, but to a long string of terrifying outbreaks and hybrid animal attacks. We knew from the start of the Montauk Monster mystery that Plum Island was at the center of various conspiracy theories, but when one looks at the entire awful history in one blog post, one must inevitably conclude that, despite its shifty and inconsistent denials, the federal government is assembling there a fearsome monster army that, if left unchecked, will someday slaughter us while we sleep.
In perfect sync with some apparently genuine positive news out of Iraq, Judith Miller is yet again delivering spoonfed reports on America's glorious strategy there, just as she did before she was disgraced at the Times. It seems we are finally being greeted as liberators — within the massive prison camps we have constructed. Miller, now employed by the neocons at the Manhattan Institute, reports in Reader's Digest that Iraq's "Camp Bucca" has been transformed from a riot zone into a super-empowering bakery, gym and mini-University, except for the 20 percent of prisoners sent to some sort of inner prison too terrifying to detail:
The writers strike ended! Stephen Colbert was so excited, he introduced his entire writing staff at the top of the show, inviting them on-stage and high-fiving each one. Tiki Barber, Mr. Met, Kevin Bacon, Mikhail Baryshnikov, and disgraced former Times star Judith Miller all ended up in the lineup too. We're just glad Judy's keeping busy!
Oh come on now, again? The CIA has subpoenaed Pulitzer-winning New York Times reporter James Risen, to get the name of a source from the journalist's blockbuster 2006 book State of War, in which he disclosed all sorts of things about U.S. intelligence shenanigans and said some mean things about President Bush. Maybe Risen can get some fashion tips from his former colleague, Judith Miller-it's so hard these days to figure out what goes with a public stockade.
A former star reporter for the New York Times, Judith Miller "retired" atop a mushroom cloud of controversy in 2005 after becoming embroiled in the investigation into who leaked the name of CIA agent Valerie Plame. She's since gone on to become a commentator on Fox News and has written for the conservative outlet Newsmax.
Everyone say happy birthday to your favorite contempt-of-court correspondent! Judith Miller is 59 today. Girlfriend looks pretty good for being that close to collecting Social Security, but it's probably just that permanent emollient the White House doles out to those willing to dispense with their pesky journalistic standards to advance the administration's political agenda. In fact, the only person left to trust, really, is Helen Thomas—now there's a reporter who hasn't accepted any Botox bribes. You can send Judy birthday greetings at judymillerfreespeech@yahoo.com. No, really.
