• Pics inside the UWS branch of Zak Pelaccio's Fatty Crab, opening tonight. [GS]
• Time Out's Jay Cheshes says Ken Friedman and April Bloomfield's John Dory "is the best new restaurant I've visited so far this year." [TONY]
• The owners of Long Island City's Water Taxi Beach will be opening a beach bar/restaurant next to the South Street Seaport this summer. [Eater]
• Described as "fitfully enjoyable," "uneven" and "bold," Frank Bruni gives Gabe Thompson's L'Artusi one star out of four in the Times today. [NYT]
• Top Chef's Fabio Viviani is now pitching frozen pizza. [EMD]
• The L Magazine's third annual "Bar Awards" is now online. [L Mag]
• NYC's top paella place, Socarrat, is now serving lunch and delivering. [TONY]
• Paris's latest three-star chef, according to the new Michelin Guide? It just so happens to be Nicolas Sarkozy's favorite spot. Global food scandal! [Guardian]

• Payard Patsserie was shut down by the Dept. of Health today. [Eater, NYT]
• Susur Lee's Shang only earns one star from Bruni in today's Times: "The magic that Mr. Lee reputedly made in Toronto hasn't followed him here." [NYT]
• Is chef Damon Wise saying goodbye to Tom Colicchio's Craft empire? [NYO]
• More mixed reviews for L'Artusi in the West Village. [Bloomberg, TONY]
• Is Anita Lo's Annisa up for sale? [Eater]
• Drew Nieporent is joining Danny Meyer at Citi Field. [Crain's]
• Is foie gras torture? Not so much, says Sarah DiGregorio of the Voice. [VV]
• Be on the lookout for new Heinz ketchup labels! [NYT]
• What's on the menu for dessert tonight? Breakfast, naturally. [NYT]

• Giorgio Armani is opening a restaurant inside his new Fifth Avenue flagship later this week. Guess it's time for a little payback, Scott Conant. [Eater]
• The Cedar Tavern on University Place is gone for good. [GS]
• A peak at the new speakeasy-themed bar Raines Law Room. [Eater]
• Anita Lo is closing Bar Q in the West Village. [Eater]
• Dinner at L'Artusi "grinds slowly off a cliff," says Adam Platt, who gives the bar-centric spot on Bleecker a single star in this week's New York. [NYM]
• Inexplicably, the cupcake craze endures. [TFB]
• Daily News food critic Danyelle Freeman has landed a book deal. [GS]
• A hot dog vendor in Times Square is retiring after 41 years. [NYP]
• Starbucks is introducing instant coffee because Americans are "focusing more on seeking satisfying experiences that enhance their lives." Uh, okay. [HP]