Imagine my plight: I, a full-grown American male, would like nothing better than to do my own laundry. But where is the detergent for me? Everywhere, the scents are flowery meadow this, springtime seabreeze that. Finally, a new contender emerges—FREY enters the fray—and I am liberated at last.

Yale University, a squirrel-less arrangement of faux-ancient stone buildings in southwestern Connecticut, has a major pooping problem. Since the beginning of September, someone—almost certainly a Yale student—has placed human feces, urine, and/or food in running dryers installed in Saybrook College, one of the university’s residential colleges. Now Yale’s own police force is hunting down the pooper.

Emma Barnett, digital media editor for the Daily Telegraph, found these care instructions in her boyfriend's "new trousers" and shared the message in the world on Twitter. She says she's received an "overwhelming response" from the post and will publish more information about the brand tomorrow.

Killer vaccines! Sex-crazed kids! Lower cholesterol! Sickening papayas! Laundry cancer! Healthier milk! Brain scans! Marathon beer! And fatty fat babies who need a little shove in the right direction! It's your Thursday Health Watch, where we watch your health—dishonestly!

If you're familiar with Rich Juzwiak's blog, fourfour, then you undoubtedly know about his "weirdest cat in the world," Winston (catch up here). But did you know that Juzwiak has another cat, Rudy, who really likes to guard socks?

[Alex Mupondi hangs one dollar notes on a drying line after washing them in Harare, Zimbabwe. Singles last years in Zimbabwe, which recently declared the U.S. dollar legal tender, and need to be laundered, literally. Photo via AP.]

N. R. Kleinfield's piece about laundromats in today's Times NY/Region section is pretty great, fun reading. And also, hysterically, fairly poetic. First two lines: "At the laundromat, irregular things happen. People square off over washers - mine; no, mine." [NYT]