If you've been counting the minutes until Chevy Chase returns to the limelight in this Friday's Law & Order episode by playing the not-entirely-fanciful role of a Hollywood actor whom, upon being stopped for drunk driving, delivers a virulently anti-Semitic diatribe to his arresting officers, we suggest you read no further: The LA Daily News' The Mayor of Television blog has seen the episode, and details the original SNL breakout star's virtual disappearance beneath the skin of a matzo-mistrusting conspiracy theorist:

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"Since it began in 2001, 'Criminal Intent' has showcased Mr. D'Onofrio as the maddeningly sensitive, eccentric Detective Goren. The series is structured differently from the original or its sex crimes spinoff, 'Law & Order: Special Victims Unit.' The focus does not shift to the prosecutors partway through."
— Alessandra Stanley, "A 'Law & Order' Spinoff Acquires Some Reinforcements," NYT, Nov. 11, 2005

Inevitably, everyone in this city is going to end up on "Law & Order." It's simple math, really. But life just became a little more difficult for "Law & Order" extras and cast members; the city is now arresting anyone on set who takes home a police uniform. No, seriously. Two actors have already been arrest. The Screen Actors Guild is pleading for mercy.

What if Martha had actually killed her broker, before he ratted out on her? That was the premise of last night's Law & Order. B*TCH is astonishingly lightly veiled extrapolation of Martha Stewart's fall from grace, complete with hard-as-nails female tycoon, fictitious stop-loss orders, SEC investigations, and a good-looking broker-walker. The makers should have at least thrown in an improbable twist — a lesbian affair with the publicist, for instance — to maintain the semblance of fiction.
B*TCH [Law & Order]