Today we break from our regularly scheduled programming to check in on Lauren “Lo” Bosworth, the perennial sidekick from Laguna Beach and The Hills. She never achieved the same level of celebrity as Kristin Cavallari or Lauren Conrad or even Audrina Patridge, but lo, she’s still here. And doing ads for Crisco!

Lauren Bosworth, of Laguna Beach and The Hills fame, appeared on Chelsea Lately last night to promote her new book, The Lo-Down. Clever girl. The starlit discussed being single and having a crush on JTT.

Jason Hope is a Scottsdale, Arizona entrepreneur. He recently made headlines for throwing a $500,000 Christmas party featuring Ludacris ($100,000 performance fee) and Snooki ($17,500 appearance fee). Why would he do that? We asked his publicist.

Miley's superfan vigilantes set their sights on a girl named Anna Oliver. Angelina Jolie laughs at her Golden Globe nomination. Hulk Hogan's beach wedding devolves into a brawl. Wednesday gossip fears for its life.

We were assaulted by a drunk asshole at a Christmas party last night, so we missed the Did You Hear about the Morgans? premiere. Luckily fictional freelancer Betsey Morgenstern doesn't get invited to anything, so she was around to cover.

Amy Poehler and Will Arnett walking in Soho with their son Archie ... Jude Law getting in a car outside his apartment in the Village ... Jessica Simpson walking in Midtown ... Hugh Jackman carrying daughter Ava home from school ... Catherine Zeta-Jones leaving her apartment building with her dog ... Christy Turlington taking daughter Grace home from school ... Cate Blanchett pushing her son in a stroller ... Meg Ryan walking in the Village ... Taylor Momsen filming scenes for Gossip Girl ... Naomi Watts walking into Whole Foods with son Alexander ... Adam Brody and Dianna Agron taking a coffee break on the set of their new movie on Long Island ... Lo Bosworth leaving her hotel ... and Matthew Broderick walking son James to school.

• Is Jennifer Aniston planning to steal the spotlight away from Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie at the Oscars by showing up to the ceremony with John Mayer and with a ring on her finger? Maybe! [Star]
• Alex Rodriguez either spent last weekend hanging out with Madonna at Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld's East Hampton mansion, or he spent it partying with Bill Clinton and Spike Lee in the Bahamas, depending on what you read. [P6, NYDN]
• Lindsay Lohan's rep says LiLo can't be anorexic since she "ate two full meals" during a recent photo shoot. It's settled! [P6]
• Gwyneth Paltrow's mom says 800 people have already joined her daughter's Tribeca gym, which hasn't even been finished yet. [NYDN]

• Tommy Hilfiger and Dee Ocleppo may have cancelled their first wedding at the last minute back in August, but it looks like the second time is the charm: The couple is reportedly getting hitched later today in a "top-secret, ultra-private" ceremony at his house in Greenwich. [NYP]
• Kanye West is supposedly thinking of moving to London next year to pursue his fashion career. [Mirror]
• Graydon Carter says he personally handles seating arrangements at the Waverly Inn. Oh, and his "three buzz words" for 2009 are "sophisticated, innovative and entitlement." [P6]
• Tragic news: Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony just spent their first weekend apart since the birth of their twins. [Us]

We have to admit, we were surprised at how much our hearts ached in the absence of Lauren Conrad - who was sojourning to Italy for some much needed R&R after exhausting her energy crying mascara tears while sparring with Audrina - during the majority of last night's episode of The Hills. But we knew those crafty MTV producers wouldn't leave us hanging, sending entertainment in the form of Linda Thompson, Brody Jenner's mom. You may be more familiar with Brody's dad, Bruce Jenner, a former Olympian who along with his wife, Kris, helm their clan of estrogen-fueled narcissists on Keeping Up With the Kardashians. Linda, on the other hand, is a plastic-surgery addled cougar extraordinaire who apparently once dated Elvis Presley. Well, on the show last night during Stephanie Pratt and LC's former flame Doug Reinhardt's maybe-date at hotspot Beso, Linda runs into the couple and eyes the shit out of little Dougie the baseball player's physique. "Are you two on a date? Is that what's happening here?" she asks. "Just wondering!" she shrugs, throwing her hands in the air. We're sure you're just curious, Linda. But this is a woman who scored with The King - so the son of a frozen burrito heir? Ain't no thang. [The Hills]

We know that the cast members of The Hills have many outside talents: Lauren Conrad is an acclaimed young adult author, Heidi Montag makes a second living as a fitness instructor, and Audrina Patridge's blog reveals her to be a face cream connoisseur. But before last night, did we have any idea how skilled the Hills women are at cutting a rug? While watching the band White Tie Affair perform at the Roosevelt, Lauren & Co. kicked out the jams with a series of white-girl moves so fierce that they could be worked into common rotation for just about any type of song, no matter the genre. In fact, to test our theory, we tried out their moves to a very 90's backing track that just so happens to be making a Kanye-assisted comeback. Go Lauren, go Lauren, go! [MTV]

Though The Hills star Lauren Conrad is highly paid enough without having to do anything but passive-aggressively judge her friends over drinks at Goa, she must be applauded for finding new skills to add to her highly staged resume. First, the 22-year-old took a detour into fashion design, and now, according to People, she's been signed to a three-book deal with HarperCollins. Heretofore limited to short stories in the vein of a Sidekicked "OMG Audrina WTF," the deal will allow Conrad to spread her wings and write young adult fiction:

For months, the rumor mill has been buzzing that Whitney Port of The Hills (she of the goofy mugging and relatively drama-free lifestyle) would be receiving her own, New York-set MTV spinoff. Last night's Hills episode, then, seemed in many cases like a trial run for that series, as fearsome People's Revolution flack Kelly Cutrone sent Whitney to the Big Apple to do some model castings, eventually manipulating the gangly blonde into a date with a shaggy-haired hunk. Does Whitney have what it takes to assume center stage, or is she forever destined to play curious second fiddle to the mothership series' Lauren Conrad? Remarkably (and with the help of videographer Molly McAleer), we were able to get our hands on a classified notes session smuggled from deep inside the bowels of MTV, and the candid reactions from execs Sheryl Rather-Wexler and Kip Finkelberg Jr. may shed some new light on Whitney's primetime viability. Godspeed, girl. [MTV]

Though it pains us to say this, we think we may be over Lo Bosworth, the incipient villainess of The Hills' fourth season. When we first met Lo, she was amongst the most breezy members of Hills forerunner Laguna Beach, but there's no place for cute quips on The Hills when out-and-out bitchery will win the day. That, ultimately, is what makes Lo's transformation all the more frustrating — though she has settled into her role as Audrina's archrival for their friend Lauren's attention, her irritating machinations are actually making us root for the blank blogger (and that's saying a lot). With the help of Molly McAleer, we pored over last night's episode and put together a list of the top five reasons we simply can't support Lo anymore. Lo, you're on notice: we're officially frienemies now. [MTV]