Over the past few months, something of a feud has developed between me and Reddit, one of the largest, most-insane hive minds on the internet. Alright, Reddit, let's talk it out.

So let's get this out of the way: I did not pretend to be dying of cancer on the popular link-sharing site Reddit. It wasn't me! Call off the hordes! Sheath your pitchforks. Extinguish the torches.