Why did an influential Christian leader just quietly leave the 20,000-member megachurch he founded in 1985? "Our pastor, he committed adultery with more than one woman. Our pastor, he committed sexual immorality, habitually, through pornography." Hmm, you have my attention.

New Jersey pastor Cedric Miller ordered married congregants to give up Facebook because the "temptation is just too great." His inspiration: The plight of congregant Elliott Subervi, who says 2000 beautiful women friended him, then tormented him with sexy messages.

Hipster farmers are pussies. Yuppie foodies are embarrassing half-men. But butchers—so fucking hot, OMG. All the blood. All the meat. All the editing in the world can't conceal NYT reporter Kim Severson's butcher lust:

On Friday, executives all over town will discover that no matter how many times they offer their anguished cries of, "Who the fuck does my assistant have to blow for me to get one of these goddamn iPhones?" to the Hollywood heavens, they'll still find themselves without the universally coveted, yet tragically scarce, miracle gadget. Those whose fears of status-symbol deprivation are most acute have already been working every last connection to obtain the phone, knowing that showing up to dinner at Cut without it would be tantamount to unzipping one's fly at the maitre d' stand and revealing to everyone in the restaurant that one's genitals had mysteriously disappeared. In a story about the growing anxiety surrounding iPhone Day, Ad Age notes how the industry's power players plan on getting their greedy hands on one: