Mercede Johnston—of the naked Wasilla Johnstons—bares her butt, boobs, and the Palin family's secrets in next month's Playboy.

Mercede Johnston claims that Bristol Palin both did and did not want to be pregnant with her brother's child. Doug Hutchison claims that the emails sent by his 16-year-old wife were actually sent by "hackers." Saturday gossip is now has a better credit rating than the U.S. government.

Mercede Johnston of the Wasilla Johnstons—a girl famous for being the sister of a guy who put his dick inside the daughter of a lady who did not become vice president—is following in her brother's autoerotic footsteps, and posing for Playboy. Page Six reports:

Levi Johnston's sister Mercede has taken to her Facebook wall and family-feuding blog to rail against Levi and Bristol's engagement—which Levi still hasn't talked to his family about. Today on The Wasilla Hillbillies: the gloves come off.

Around the time he proposed to Bristol, Levi Johnston threatened to ostracize sister Mercede if she didn't take down her blog. Turns out Mercede's blog is controlled by a pair of liberal bloggers Sarah Palin considers her worst enemies.

Levi Johnston's campaign to get back into the Palins' good graces has taken a surprising turn: Following little sister Mercede's claim that Bristol Palin's pregnancy "was NOT an accident!" Levi apparently threatened to disown Mercede if she didn't shut up.

Levi Johnston has successfully marketed his "brand" after impregnating Bristol Palin. But what of his sister, Mercede, who impregnated no one? When will somebody pay her for being tangentially news-related? Soon, probably, now that she has a funny blog.

Sarah Palin's former future son-in-law, Levi Johnston, hit the Early Show, continuing his soft-spoken media beef with the Alaska governor. He blames his breakup with Bristol Palin, the mother of his child, on the election.

Being half of a celebrity twosome has its perks, not least of which is starpower greater than the sum of its parts. But there are certain rules that should be observed. Do not, under any circumstances, appear in a treacly magazine spread rhapsodizing about your love, or you will be broken up within a month. And please, resist the temptation to get matching tattoos, especially each other's names, as history has taught us that even the most inspiring and rock-solid romantic unions—Lindsay & Sam! Chris and Rihanna! Britney & K-Fed!—cannot survive the curse of the matching ink.

Hey, it's true! Mercede Johnston really did leave that MySpace message saying Sarah Palin considers her "white trash" just because her bro Levi knocked up Bristol and her mom Sherry is a pill-popper.

Please let this be true. According to a barely literate MySpace message, Sarah Palin is snubbing the family of Levi Johnston, the jock who knocked up Bristol, because they're "white trash." (Not that we'd disagree.)