Whose side are you on? Are you a stone-cold originator, or some sugary carpetbagging poseur? Would you like sprinkles with that, or might a tasty chocolate dip be more to your liking? Are you in or are you out? Sugar cone or waffle? Most importantly: Mister Softee or New York Ice Cream?

A Manhattan Mister Softee ice cream truck driver named Oner Ismail was fined $350 for picking up five drunk people and driving them to a club, making that Mister Softee truck the best gypsy cab of all time. [NYP; image]

Ice Cream War! Watch as a brawl erupts between two ice cream truck drivers—one of the famous Mister Softee franchise and the other a NO NAME LOSER—over a parking dispute near Columbus Circle. Or, just another NYC afternoon.

Either this man just discovered the most creative way to cross the street or he decided it was a good day to dance with the devil and tempt fate.

Why does Mike Bloomberg hate Mister Softee?

• David Burke's Townhouse closes tomorrow for renovations. Cafe Boulud will shuts its doors for a revamp beginning in a couple of weeks. [Eater, TFB]
• Mermaid Inn owner Danny Abrams says he'll open the Mermaid Oyster Bar in the former Smith's space on MacDougal Street next month. [GS]
• Michael Huynh, the man behind Bar Bao and Baoguette, says his Bia Garden, the "city's first Vietnamese beer garden," will open next week. [GS, Thrillist]
• Gabriel Stulman's Joseph Leonard opens next week, too. (Photos here.) When it does, it will be the first restaurant in the city to offer boxed water. [VV]
• A roundup of other restaurants opening this week and next. [TONY, NYM]
• Did Publisher's Weekly jump the gun by posting a pic of Frank Bruni? [TFB]
• If you get an invite to dine at the White House and you're a captain of industry, be advised that you'll be expected to pay for your meal. [NYDN]

We don't know how we missed this till now, but apparently Mister Softee himself — 78-year-old James F. Conway Sr., who founded the ice-cream company 50 years ago with his late brother, William — died Sunday in Ocean City, N.J. For true devotees of his rich, creamy, truck-vended frozen delight, we'll point you to a memorial service scheduled for today in Haddonfield, N.J., down near Philadelphia, that you might like to attend. Not so much a fan? We'll point you to the same service — and suggest you sit in a car outside it, incessantly blaring a repetitive jingle. In tribute, of course.