The results of the Conde Nast Magazine Death Pool are in, stunningly early: the company announced this morning that it's folding Gourmet, Cookie, and two bridal magazines, Elegant Bride and Modern Bride.

You guys were so harsh yesterday about the mercenary wedding plans of Heather Warnken and Michael Vallarelli that even our cold hearts almost twitched with a pang of conscience. And then Heather's brother Byron wrote to us about where we'd gone wrong in our earlier post. In the interest of fairness, we now post his letter, which describes Heather's heroic battle against an eating disorder ("she dedicated herself to recovery from the disease") and reaffirms her credentials ("She played DIII field hockey at Hopkins, where she graduated with something like a 3.7.")

"I think that I'm a modern bride because I'm a rare hybrid of old-fashioned priorities and progressive female empowerment," said Modern Bride of the Year Heather Warnken in the adorable video that won her that title. Mmm. Know what's extra empowering? Getting the 200 guests who you've invited to your destination wedding to buy "Honey Money" credits towards your honeymoon in Bora Bora! "With Heather in school, etc., unfortunately we're not really at the life juncture of copper cookware, roasters, and 400 count egyptian [sic] cotton sheets," Heather and her fiance Mike write on what has to be the most obnoxious wedding website of all time. "We are however, ready to take the sickest honeymoon of all time. ("sick" = awesome.)" Oh. my. God.