Oh my god. Have you cleaned out your truck recently?

There's a downtick in Second Amendment paranoia over gun-control legislation that never came to pass, and retailers are jittery about lower gun sales. Says one executive: "[W]e underestimated the decline."

High-quality counterfeits of American $100 and $50 are keeping North Korea's economy afloat, The End of Money author David Wolman reports in Time. Estimates on Pyongyang's black market counterfeiting profits range from $15 to $25 million "to several hundred million dollars' worth" every year.

Jersey Shore quote machine The Situation has reportedly signed up for ABC's Dancing with the Stars. With that gig, he'll probably make even more than the shocking $5 million he'll pull in this year. Where does the cash come from?

Bristol Palin's speaking fee: $14,000.

Lindsay Lohan is reportedly angling for $1 million for her first post-jail interview, and going to prison could end up boosting sales of her clothing line, too. "Financially, it's the best thing that could have ever happened to Lindsay."

Joran van der Sloot is reportedly seeking $1 million for his first TV tell-all.

Vainglorious blogger Nikki Finke is demanding HBO make her a paid "consultant" for the TV show that mimics her life. This isn't the same as selling the rights to her life—because the show is not about her, remember?

Luxury still exists, in a vending machine in Abu Dhabi's Emirates Palace hotel. GOLD To Go is a German invention that monitors the price of gold and dispenses bars and customizable coins. This is its international debut. Sparkly! [AP, Awl]

People are already predicting the results of the McSteamy Lawsuit. I'm taking bets.

You probably think Swine Flu isn't still the stylish pandemic to be a part of. Guess what? Swine Flu still thinks it is! In fact, it's the hot new disease of the summer. So 2009.

Hey, kiddo. Stop your crying. We know you were worried that Kevin Bacon and Kyra Sedgwick lost everything to Bernie Madoff, because it sounded really bad. But now Kyra's spoken publicly about it, and they're gonna be just fine.

Amateur-mafioso-cum-Daily-Beast "writer" Burt Ross got his Madoff Check from the government and blogged about it.

Crazy old Courtney Love continues to regale the internet with her drunken ramblings. This time the rock and/or roller rants at length, on a CitySearch page no less, about how New York accounting firm Altman, Greenfield, & Selvaggi has bilked her out of some money. "my forensic pyschiatrist looked at herbooks and declared Victoria Blake to be 'psychotic'", she keens. "Selvaggis justa bad guy, theres Beemers and ironically he opened a joint business account with an ex boyfriend who rana MASSIVE real estate scam involving unincoprated townships and convalescent homes through these accounts." Big words! She also mentions that members of Kurt Cobain's family have been nefariously cheated. Is it real? Is it fake? Either way real Courtney Love or fake Courtney Love has wayyy too much time on her hands. The full, bizarre missive after the jump.