Libyan dictator Muammar Qaddafi can be forgiven for his physical appearance these days. After all, his country is being bombed, rebels are fighting an increasingly bloody war with his army, and his "voluptuous blond" Ukrainian nurse left him. But things weren't always this way. Back in the heady days of 1995 Qaddafi, now 68 years old, gave a Brazilian plastic surgeon an envelope "full of U.S. dollars and Swiss francs" to halt the appearance of aging. The AP spoke to the doctor:

NATO agreed on Thursday night to take complete command of military operations in Libya. Psych! NATO is only leading the part that involves flying jets around, while the U.S., France and the UK are stuck doing the "actual war stuff" (technical term).

No channels in the United States are as riveting as Libyan state television, based on this one short clip we've watched and nothing else. Check out this guy, this anchor. Does he "like" Qaddafi? We'd guess yes, since he pulls out an AK-47 in the middle of his broadcast and says, "In the name of Almighty God, I pledge to you, my Dear Leader, that I will sacrifice my last breath, my last bullet, my last drop of blood, last baby and child for you." Don't forget your wife!

Well, there you have it: Donald Trump says he "screwed" Muammar Qaddafi, in the sack. This is, so far, his greatest qualification in his fake run for the Republican presidential nomination. Oh wait, he just meant he "screwed" Qaddafi in real estate, not via actual sex.

Barely two days after U.N. authorization, the vaunted no-fly zone over Libya has been been "officially enforced" by a coalition of U.S., French and British forces. Here's the latest from the ongoing conflict in Libya:

Despite a UN resolution and threats by European powers to strike Muammar Qaddafi's forces if they continue to attack Libyan cities, troops loyal to the Libyan dictator today assaulted the eastern city of Benghazi with tanks and aircraft. Update below.

President Obama spoke from the White House earlier this afternoon to give some details about that minor U.S.-supported military intervention in Libya authorization the United Nations passed yesterday. He probably didn't want to say anything, but he's jetting to Brazil this weekend and felt he should throw American citizens a bone about the possible third war we're entering.

As the United Nations voted last night to impose a no-fly zone over Libya, a totally sane Muammar Qaddafi sat down with a Portuguese TV news channel. He had some interesting things to say:

President Obama is seriously wearing on the patience of America's most war-loving war lovers, the Washington neoconservatives. Why won't Obama be reasonable and just let them have their endless War in Libya? Muammar Qaddafi is strengthening his grip and moving east, so the window of opportunity for invading another decentralized tribal country and then spending a dozen years there while alienating everyone in the region is closing. And so the neocons have banded together to write Obama a sternly worded letter asking for their war, please, now.

President Obama's Director of National Intelligence, James Clapper, was called to testify before the Senate Armed Services Committee today, and stupidly tried to give an honest assessment of difficult foreign policy situations in response to questions asking for that. Now he's in big trouble, or at least Lindsey Graham wants him to resign.

With revolution sweeping the Arab world and new photos of Hitler's mistress coming to light, murderous dictators are much in the news. Here's border control zealot Mark Krikorian raising a timely question, in National Review blog The Corner:

Saif Qaddafi, the Western-educated sociopath child of Libyan leader Muammar Qaddafi, has some guests staying in his $16 million London sex pad today, while he isn't there. Uninvited guests at that: They're activists who say they'll occupy the mansion "until this property can be returned to the Libyan people."

Looks like Libyan leader Muammar Qaddafi is ready step down! But he wants to make a deal first: According to reports (none of which have been officially confirmed) in Arab media outlets, Qaddafi is looking for a guarantees of safety for himself, his family, and his rather large fortune, and rumor has it that the dictator is looking for a place to crash. But apparently the rebels aren't biting—not only have they officially rejected "broad" talks, saying that any negotiations have to start with Qaddafi agreeing to quit, but sources for al Jazeera and Reuters indicate that rebel leaders aren't prepared to let Qaddafi keep his money—and maybe not his immunity from trial, either. [Reuters; image via AP]

In a televised speech today, Muammar Qaddafi compared the situation in Libya to the 1993 FBI raid in Waco, Texas, and then got snobby, saying: "I do not follow satellite TV — I read books."

As Muammar Qaddafi continued to launch attacks against Libyan cities today, Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez rushed to Brother Leader's defense, telling a crowd of recent college graduates in Caracas:

If you accepted money from Libyan dictator Muammar Qaddafi (or any member of his family), now would be a good time to give it back. It's what Nelly Furtado is doing, anyway—the pop star Tweeted earlier that she received a million dollars from "the Qaddafi clan" to perform a show in Italy four years ago ("for guests at a hotel," she elaborated); in the same Tweet she wrote she planned to "donate" the money (to charity, one hopes). And while we obviously applaud her decision, it seems as though the best bet going forward, for Furtado as for all musicians, is to, you know, not perform shows for dictators or their families. In the meantime, we eagerly await responses from the following pop stars regarding the money that they received, at one time or another, from "the Qaddafi clan":

Libyan dictator Muammar Qaddafi, the benevolent leader who bombs his own people, has granted an interview to ABC's Christiane Amanpour — a sure sign that his days are numbered. Although he certainly doesn't think that. Why would they overthrow me? he explains to Amanpour. "My people love me. They would die for me." Well, okay.

It's always fun to catch up with former Bush White House neocons because they're usually still doing awful things. Politico's Laura Rozen found some dirt on Richard Perle who, it turns out, is part of Muammar Qaddafi's image makeover team.

Confronted with rumors that he'd fled Libya for Venezuela, embattled and increasingly violent Libyan dictator Muammar Qaddafi released a short, 40-second video to Libyan state television, in which he denounces the reporting of the "dogs in the media" while sitting inside a van outside his home, and holding an umbrella. It appears to be his CalArts senior thesis project?

Libya's UN delegation has broken with dictator Muammar el-Qaddafi over his "crimes against humanity and crimes of war" and "genocide" against Libyan protesters, whom he has been carpet-bombing all day. Good call, Libya's UN delegation.