A pair of teenagers who allegedly tried to pull off a robbery at gunpoint in Charlottesville, Virginia, last week picked the wrong two victims for their mugging. When police arrived at the scene of the attempted robbery last Tuesday night, they found Johnny Calderon Jr. and Gerald Allen bloodied and in the custody of the two unidentified men who they had immediately before been trying to rob. Judging from the condition of Calderon and Allen, their intended victims made it very clear that they were not the kind of people to willingly part with their valuables when faced with the threat of violence.

The above video was taken at 2:40 a.m. on March 9 at the 18th Avenue F train station in Borough Park, Brooklyn. In it, you can see a man in a hooded sweatshirt attacking a 56-year-old woman. When confronted, the woman attempts to flee, only to be thrown to the ground and kicked. The mugger then grabs her bag, empties it and roots through her belongings. As he does so, the woman picks up her empty bag and runs. The last image is of her running through one of the station's doors, her attacker close behind.

This is Anthony Miranda, 24, an enterprising but unlucky young Chicagoan who on Friday learned the hard way that choosing your victim is the most important part of any robbery.

New York Observer reporter Nate Freeman got the shit kicked out of him last week, then wrote a florid essay about it, in the Observer's signature first-person plural editorial voice:

Three would-be muggers attempting to rob a German exchange student in Sydney were foiled by, uh, ninjas. You know. Like the turtles. The lesson, obviously, is "Don't mug people outside a goddamn ninja school." [Sydney Morning Herald]

Atlantic contributor Jeffrey Goldberg started his very first blog this week, with a charmingly naive post mostly about how he knows nothing about blogging but does sit near uber-blogger Andrew Sullivan. "This is almost certainly a mistake," he begins, and it turns out he's 100% right. When the New York Observer's media blogger Matt Haber (the forgotten Gawker Alum!) devoted a post yesterday to basically announcing the existence of Goldberg's blog and needling Goldberg for his initial boneheaded support of the Iraq War, Goldberg blew up with rage. Haber's post was a mugging, he says. Jeffrey, Jeffrey, Jeffrey. We'll show you what a mugging is.