Who really cares that Melania Trump posed nude? That the New York Post published the photos last month briefly distracted from her husband’s feud with the family of a dead Muslim veteran, but otherwise mostly served to ignite another scandal: What’s the deal with Melania’s early immigration status? We all moved on from the nudes per se so quickly that we all forgot to remember that thanks to a bizarre (and mercifully discontinued) practice at Ivy League and Seven Sisters schools, there is some chance—slim though it may be—that there exists, somewhere on this globe, a nude or two of Hillary Clinton and of Donald Trump.

Semi-famous white guy Spencer Pratt, who is shopping a sex tape of himself and soon-to-be ex-wife Heidi Montag, has reportedly set an asking price of $5 million: "This is the best thing I can do for my ex-wife." [TMZ; Bauer-Griffin]