nipplegate

Jessica Simpson Discovers New Way to Expose Oneself On Live Television

Richard Lawson · 09/11/08 02:53PM

Remember when Janet Jackson ripped her shirt off at the Superbowl and pressed her breasts against every television camera in the stadium and children wept blood for weeks (some died!) and God thunderously shook his head and sent us six more years of war and hurricane floods? It was a national tragedy to be sure, but it also made Janet Jackson sorta (in)famous again! Free, tit-baring publicity cannot be argued with. Now, ever the fame hungry Texan, Jessica Simpson—singer, reality divorcée, failing actress—has found a new nipple slip. The on-air ass slip! Yes indeed, Ms. Simpson was on the Early Morning, America... Today! show singing one of her new, laboriously be-twanged country tunes on an outdoor stage. Twas a windy day that chilly September morn, and a great breeze did sweep up under the young lass's skirt, exposing her bare bottom. Though you could really only see it if you could freeze frame it with your TiVo box or whatever. So thank God Nerve captured the offending screenshot. It begs the question though why Jessica would decide to eschew undergarments when performing live, outdoors, on a windswept day. Perhaps it was on purpose. She has long cultivated a dimbulb persona, so maybe this was all calculated. So first Janet Jackson's accidental titsplosion and now this. What could be next? Spencer Pratt rubs his junk on Larry King's face? Heidi Montag accidentally has sex with Brody Jenner at a live Hills reunion finale? The world waits anxiously.