The Third Jihad is a "documentary" purporting to show that U.S. Muslims are here to "infiltrate and dominate" America, funded by a mysterious right-wing pressure group. So it was a natural fit for the NYPD, which has launched an unprecedented and illegal campaign of surveillance against Muslim New Yorkers. According to the New York Times, the NYPD screened The Third Jihad on a "continuous loop" for its trainees, and more than 1,500 officers have seen it.

Computer security consultant Thomas Ryan's ham-fisted attempt at spying on Occupy Wall Street last October exposed his own snitching to the feds. But the FBI apparently still trusts him enough to have had him speak at their big computer security conference this week.

The next time people ask me what it's like to live in New York City, I'm going to refer them to today's New York Times story about Aaron Vansintjan, the 21-year-old Belgian college student who managed to undergo about four key New York experiences in the span of a few hours.

Though yesterday's news was that 40-year-old confessed Frappucino firebomber Ray Lazier Lengend threw Starbucks-themed Molotov cocktails to avenge petty slights, the New York Daily News reports that prosecutors now say Lengend wanted to hit "as many Muslims and Arabs as possible."

After apprehending the New Yorker who constructed Molotov cocktails out of Starbucks Frappucino bottles and used them to attack Hindu and Muslim places of worship, a bodega, and a priate residence yesterday, the NYPD extracted a confession from the Frap-otov bomber. He's not a huge bigot, just a minor one with a really strong sense of vengeance, the New York Post reports:

Here you see (an extremely uncooperative) Carlos Fabara, an NYPD sergeant of 14 years experience, being hauled off a Greyhound bus and arrested, for being drunk. Too drunk to ride a Greyhound bus? Think about that. A helpful Youtube commenter explains: "yeah so before the video was taken, he and his friend were stumbling drunk and slurring when they boarded (too early) and refused to get off when they were asked to wait outside with the other ticketed customers. Plus, the driver was on a short fuse after [a man was kicked off for smoking cigarettes in the bathroom], so things just escalated really quickly. they weren't doing anything in particular, but they also weren't cooperating. not really sure if they deserved to get arrested, but the one officer did."

Early last September, before Occupy Wall Street was even a glint of pepper spray in an obstinate protester's eye, the NYPD were mobilizing against another crowd menace: the West Indian American Day Parade in Crown Heights, Brooklyn. Sure, some officers were spotted getting into the spirit by grinding against paradegoers' behinds, but a far greater number were bracing for the mayhem that frequently accompanies the debauched annual event. This year's parade was particularly violent — there were multiple shootings, resulting in one civilian fatality and an officer wounded in his arm. In the days that followed, New York cops had had enough, and they created a Facebook group to vent their anger. It was extremely racist.

New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg has never been accused of taking a heavy-handed approach to governing. Want to smoke? Go ahead! Want to have a little salt with your deep-fried meat product? All you, baby! Want to camp out for a few weeks in a park to protest? Who's going to stop you? Only his army.

Are you afraid of Jose Pimentel, the "lone wolf terrorist" arrested by the NYPD this weekend in what was absolutely not a transparent bid to distract from Occupy Wall Street with good publicity? No? What if we told you he smoked weed and tried to circumcise himself? Frightened now?

Occupy Wall Street protester Isaac Wilder tried to retrieve his backpack and other personal property confiscated during Tuesday night's HYPD police raid on Zuccotti Park from the city's Department of Sanitation. He didn't find any of his belongings, but he did find lots of destroyed property.

New York City council member Jumaane Williams tweets that his colleague on the dais, Ydanis Rodriguez, "was hit and arrested" during tonight's raid at the Occupy Wall Street site. Let the record show that NYPD did not discriminate in its evacuation proceedings!

If we still had a heart (we recently sold it for firewood), it would go out to Mamadou and Assetou Sy: a Manhattan couple of the Muslim faith who have been targeted by 911-dialing pranksters at least 155 times in the past two years. Are their harassers anti-Muslim?

The NYPD is not the most ethical, least-gun smuggling of police forces. But are they actually 4channers? An NYPD officer is under investigation after some gross pictures of a crime scene showed up on the internet's foulest message board.

You might want to sit down for this. Are you sitting down? Okay: an officer in the employ of the New York Police Department was convicted today of planting crack cocaine on two innocent people. Not only that—it's apparently only one episode in a "widespread culture of corruption endemic in [NYPD] drug units." I know. I know! My jaw dropped too!

The NYPD has allegedly come up with an ingenious way to sabotage the Occupy Wall Street protest in lower Manhattan: Just send drunks and homeless people down there!

Hundreds of off-duty cops showed up in the Bronx on Friday to protest the indictment of corrupt colleagues on ticket-fixing charges. Among the slogans on their signs: "Just Following Orders." Doesn't that sound... familiar?

Oh no: violent protesters! An NYPD police association is threatening lawsuits against protesters who assault police officers and is warning of "growing violence," even as Occupy Wall Street has proven its non-violence time and again.

Eight NYPD officers were charged today with agreeing to smuggle 22 illegal guns into the city in exchange for cash. Turns out it was an FBI sting operation. As are most illegal plots. You fools.

Dep. Insp. Anthony Bologna, the NYPD commander whose loose ways with pepper spray caused a stir last month at Occupy Wall Street (and cost him some vacation days), has told colleagues that he "acted with the best intentions" when he sprayed a group of ladies who weren't doing anything at all, and he's been "tortured" ever since.

Occupy Wall Street poster villain and viral video star Anthony Bologna, the NYPD Deputy Inspector who pepper-sprayed a woman because he felt like it, was found in violation of department guidelines (see Code Section 819B: "No officer should act like a power-drunk psychopath within 50 meters of a visual recording device"). His punishment? 10 days of vacation, docked.