Bennifer Memories: Affleck Misses His Shrimping Days
According to an article on the always incredibly reliable Female First website, Jennifer Garner's withholding toes from fiancé/impregnator Ben Affleck. To the paparazzi lens, the relationship looks wholly satisfying, but every time Affleck thinks about ex Jennifer Lopez's little piggies, he descends into sepia-toned remembrances of toe-sucking past and the accompanying Pavlovian drooling response:
Ben Affleck reportedly misses his infamous toe-sucking sessions with ex fiancée Jennifer Lopez. The Hollywood heartthrob, who is now romancing screen beauty Jennifer Garner, is said to have told friends his new lover doesn't share J.Lo's bizarre fetish, known as "shrimping". A pal of the actor revealed: "Ben was embarrassed when his toe-sucking exploits were revealed. But he's been joking that it's the only thing he misses about JLo".
Perhaps Garner should be more sensitive to her partner's needs and deliver those forbidden phalanges into his toe-hungry maw. Clearly, Affleck's proclivity for tea-bagging is a classic Freudian transference of his unmet desires.
