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Who knows if it true? But, in case it is, a word of advice: Sodomize tonight, while you still can.

UPDATE: "For what it's worth, we're hearing the same thing," reports a pal in newsmagland. "And by 'we,' of course, I mean the real reporters downstairs. I haven't heard shit."

UPDATE 2: Our much smarter (but nudgy) slutty sister has been all over this story all day. Now make her stop pulling our hair.

Drudge Report