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Bonnie Fuller's upcoming memoir will be titled The Joys of Much Too Much: Go For the Big Life — The Great Career, The Perfect Guy and Everything Else You Ever Wanted (Even If You're Afraid You Don't Have What It Takes), as Jeff "Big Lug" Bercovici reported last week in WWD.

But we were worried perhaps that title was insufficiently descriptive. Good thing Claire Zulkey has obtained some secret, rejected alternative titles.

We can't decide which we like best:

How To Lose Your Ass and Regain Your Life: Reluctant Confessions of a Big-Butted Star — Is What I Would Have Titled This Book If I Were Fat But I'm Not, I'm Thin, Thin, Thin! And You Are Not, or Oh the Fabulousness Of It All: My Career, My Office, This Pair of Shoes You Can't Afford and All The Other Things I Have That You Probably Want (And You Will Never Have).

Claire's got some other options, though none is How I've Ruined the Mag Business and Depressed Everyone Who Works in It. It was probably just too terse.

[Image courtesy of New York Social Diary.]

Alternate Titles for Bonnie Fuller's Book [Zulkey.com]