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• Ornery actor Russell Crowe looks into starting a job-training program for Australian prisons similar to that on Rikers Island. If Crowe is tried and sentenced for an "incident" in which assaulted a Mercer Hotel employee with a phone, we're sure this sort of activism will keep him safe from forced ass-fucking. [Page Six]
• The residences at 740 Park Avenue are so gilded, not even Barbra Streisand scored approval from the co-op board. [R&M]
• In Eddie Hayes' memoir, the litigator notes that the infamous Vogue editor is "physically incompetent." Great news for assistants who bruise easily. [Page Six]
• Meanwhile, Vogue editor-at-large André Leon Talley notes on Oprah that "Miss Anna don't like fat people." Big secret there. [Lowdown]
• Actress Catherine Zeta-Jones refuses a Fashion Week jeweler's gift — $50,000 ring — presumably because it didn't match her noticeably larger breasts. [Gatecrasher]