Madonna: The Wilting English Rose?
47-year-old Madonna arrived at the Gaultier show in Paris yesterday looking like, well, a 47-year-old — and the British press is concerned for their adopted pop-granny:
Her skin was stretched taut across her razor-sharp cheekbones, and her chin was puckered in a most unflattering manner.
To make matters worse, it appeared that Madge also has the beginnings of a receding hairline.
A fellow guest at the show said: "She looked pretty rough. Madonna usually looks so groomed, so it was a bit of a shock to see her so ropey."
Madonna's looking ropey?! Well, that makes us positively shirty. We can't have our nancy disco idols showing up looking like grotty mingers — absolute gobshite, we say.*
*Obviously, we have no idea what we just wrote.