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Put on your shredded leggings and perfect your party pose, because it's time for the Sparks-fueled joy and hipster-lovin' magic of Blue States Lose. Per usual, we sort pictures of young people shaming their generation on The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak shows you the path to post-punk redemption.

10) Last Night's Party. Happy Angel photo #1150: This is the kind of dude who memorizes all the words to "Common People" because he feels like he really "gets" it, without realizing that if you switch the lyrics from "St Martin's College" to "Fashion Institute of Technology" and change a few of the gender-specific pronouns, well ... you know. Nice specs, though.

9) The Cobrasnake. Kill Hannah Broclie photo #0605: We saw this on a bunch of bands at South by Southwest but forgot to make mention of it: Dainty neck scarves are officially here, so pick up a guitar, play 2 shows, get hyped by a blog, cut up some tablecloth and make your grandmother question whether her precious little angel is actually "one of those."

8) Last Night's Party. Shindig 1000 photo #1662: Have you ever seen a more blatant attempt at eroticism strike out so miserably? This is like when you're walking alone in Chinatown at 3:30 a.m. and there's a hooker desperately trying to make rent money and feed her two kids. It's depressing, not sexy, and you feel ashamed for humanity and you just want to slit your wrists. And come to think of it, the dude on the left's '80s-Miami-coke-dealer-chic look lends him an air of pimpitude. Is ironic prostitution a new youth culture trend we're not aware of? It's getting harder to keep up.

7) Misshapes. August 15th, 2006 photo #041: The reason her hand-painted dialogue bubbles are empty is because every time she drew Snoopy and Cathy and the little kid from the Family Circus on her cheek, they briefly assessed the reality of their situation, considered their options, and then shot themselves in the face before bothering to get a word out.

6) The Cobrasnake. Kill Hannah Broclie photo #0274: Do all these hipsters just want to be mimes deep down inside? Here's Douchey McTwattlefuck doing his classic "On My Cell Phone!" routine.

5) The Cobrasnake. Shirtless Chichgo photo #1472: You may think that your paralegal officemateyou know, the one that blasts Death Cab For Cutie and Postal Service all day but isn't aware of the connection between the twois the creation/definition of the hipster Dude (capital D), but have a look at these amazing specimens. They're not afraid to take their shirts off and chug from pitchers at a bar, but they have enough Bedford Avenue sensibility in them to opt for the neck-bandana and ironic tattoos. Our inner cultural anthropoligist just sprouted the biggest erection seen since Anderson Cooper was assigned the "guys who cruise the Port Authority bathrooms" story.

4) Last Night's Party. Happy Angel photo #0971: Clubber Guy: "Yeah, motherfucker! I'm on Spring Break! I'm in New York! I've got a glass of champagne and I'm gonna get wasted! Then I'm gonna dance! Yeah!!!! What do you think about that, Angry Goth?"

Angry Goth: "The sins of the guilty corrupt the morals of the innocent. The world is a wasting void of nothingness. Your soul will rot away as you pray for the end to be painless, but you'll fail. Oh, how you'll fail."

Clubber Guy: "Yeah!! Nice shave job, hombre!"

3) Misshapes. April 15th, 2006 photo #012: "I just skated over to Misshapes, and boy is my inflated sense of ego and over-aggressive attempt at looking cool tired."

2) You Tube. The Steve Aoki thumbnail for the Misshapes Cheers video: If you haven't seen this genius video yet, prepare yourself for the biggest greatest hits package of fucktards you'll see in 2k6. But stepping beyond that for a moment, is there no greater representation than the thumbnail selected for the video? The ironic mustache, the ratty attempt at a goateethe trust fund. It's the perfect one-frame symbol. And to top it all off, there's the amazing comment on this Ultragrrrl post that we swear we did not make up or post ourselves. It goes: "My ultimate mission at Coachella this year is to meet Steve Aoki. Make it happen, Sarah." Seriously, are we being set up?

1) Misshapes. April 15th, 2006 photo #234: To gain acceptance to the gang, individuals must "Blood-in." This means they must spill someone's blood, or have their own blood spilled. There are various ways (fights, slashing, assaults against law enforcement personnel, rapes, robberies) to Blood-in, but blood should be spilled. In New York City, the Bloods have demonstrated a propensity for violent attacks against unknowing victims. Usually, victims are slashed across the face with little or no warning of the attack. Bloods have been identified in areas throughout New York City; Brooklyn's 77Pct. (Crown Heights), Queens' 100 Pct. (Far Rockaway), and Manhattan's 28 Pct. (11th Street). In New York City jails, the Bloods have developed a reputation as a vicious gang. They have been responsible for over 50% of the stabbings and slashings throughout the Department of Corrections. All of this obviously making them ripe for satire and irony.