Tribeca: Your Gruppy Shangri-La
The best way to destroy a neighborhood's low-key appeal is to trumpet said appeal in a newspaper, and such is the case with Tribeca and the New York Sun (though, to be fair, it's not as if Tribeca is undiscovered, nor is the Sun really capable of trumpeting much of anything to an effect). Nevertheless, the paper heralds the gold-paved streets below Canal as the latest neighborhood to undergo suburbification: there are real live families down there, complete with Maclarens and Bjorns and and freshly imported nannies. Not content to have merely conquered Brooklyn, child-rearing New Yorkers are moving downtown in droves to escape uptown social climbing, bringing with them exclusive preschools, indoor play areas ripe for networking, and overpriced kiddie cupcakes. If you're single or not yet breeding, you'd best get packing: these people are fertile-wombed Borg, and they won't stop until every last corner of Manhattan offers mother-baby Pilates.
