Ann Coulter, 45: Axis of Evil
Sure, we like to knock Ann Coulter around now and again. Who doesn't, really? Like all her fans, though, we've often wondered how much truth there is to the popular chestnut that she says outrageous things not because she particularly believes them, but merely to gain media attention and thus drive her book sales. And more importantly: does it work? A hard-hitting investigative campaign (i.e. dispatching Intern Mary into the depths of Lexis and Bookscan) revealed that a correlation may indeed have existed between evil quotations, press mentions (in the New York Times, New York Post, and New York Daily News for our purposes), and book sales for her earlier tomes. However, Coulter may be working it a little too hard in support of her most recent book (Godless: The Church of Liberalism). Eventually, nothing's shocking, even from Ann. Graph and supporting quotations after the jump.
1. "Liberals hate America, they hate flag-wavers, they hate abortion opponents, they hate all religions except Islam, post 9/11. Even Islamic terrorists don't hate America like liberals do. They don't have the energy. If they had that much energy, they'd have indoor plumbing by now."
2. "My only regret with Timothy McVeigh is he did not go to the New York Times building."
3. "It would be a much better country if women did not vote. That is simply a fact. In fact, in every presidential election since 1950 — except Goldwater in '64 — the Republican would have won, if only the men had voted."
4. "Liberals attack their country and then go into diarrhea panic if anyone criticizes them ..."
5. "Then there are the 22 million Americans on food stamps. And of course there are the 39 million greedy geezers collecting Social Security. The greatest generation rewarded itself with a pretty big meal."
6. "Being nice to people is, in fact, one of the incidental tenets of Christianity (as opposed to other religions whose tenets are more along the lines of 'kill everyone who doesn't smell bad and doesn't answer to the name Mohammed')".
7. "[Canadians] better hope the United States doesn't roll over one night and crush them. They are lucky we allow them to exist on the same continent."
8. "Kerry warned Americans not to 'overhype this election' — and if there's one guy who's good at calming down excited voters, it's John Kerry. Apparently, word didn't get out to the Iraqis, who were dancing and singing in the streets. (Isn't it great to see Muslims celebrating something other than the slaughter of Americans?)"
9. "I think the government should be spying on all Arabs, engaging in torture as a televised spectator sport, dropping daisy cutters wantonly throughout the Middle East and sending liberals to Guantanamo."
10. "[North Korea] is a major threat. I just think it would be fun to nuke them and have it be a warning to the rest of the world."
11. "I think our motto should be, post-9-11, 'raghead talks tough, raghead faces consequences.'"
12. "These broads are millionaires, lionized on TV and in articles about them, reveling in their status as celebrities and stalked by grief-arazzis. I've never seen people enjoying their husbands' deaths so much."