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Knowing that Diane Sawyer's "get" of Mel Gibson for the first televised stop on his Official "Hey, Me And The Jews Are Totally Cool Now" Redemption Tour will be a ratings bonanza, ABC News has already started chumming the media's shark tank with sound-bitable morsels from the coming interview on its website (which, apparently, is so bursting with the supplicating goodness that only a recently humiliated Hollywood superstar can deliver that it must be spread over two days). The first such quote features Gibson's obligatory dismissal of his anti-Semitic tirade as the devil-juice-fueled ramblings of a monster, pretty much in those exact words:

Sawyer asked Gibson what caused his comments on the night of his arrest.

Diane Sawyer: "What did you think it was?"

Mel Gibson: "Me? It was just the stupid rambling of a drunkard, you know and ... what I need to do to heal myself and to be assuring and allay the fears of others and to heal them if they had any heart wounds from something I may have said. So, this is the last thing I want to be is that kind of monster," Gibson said.

ABCNews.com promises more excerpts later on today, which may or may not include the actor's explanation of how alcohol gave him the peculiar power to identify his arresting officer as a member of the war-mongering tribe whose bar mitzvahs his desperate, damage-controlling publicist has long ago committed him to attend.