This image was lost some time after publication.

The mystery of whether or not late-to-the-party Third World do-gooder Madonna has in fact adopted a Malawian orphan continues to deepen. Initially, Reuters reported that she had called ahead and requested that officials ready a selection of orphaned boys from the AIDS-ravaged African state, one of whom she'd take home with her. Dutiful flack Liz Rosenberg quickly discounted the story, claiming Madonna's trip was purely a charity mission and that she had no plans to adopt. Now, a Malawi father tells the AP that his semi-orphaned son was in fact the lucky one-year-old plucked from a destitute existence of famine and disease to lead a life of almost inconceivable privilege, albeit tempered with the regular humilation of having a mom who insists on picking them up from soccer practice wearing nothing but cameltoe-baring leotards:

"I am the father of David, who has been adopted," Banda, 32, told The Associated Press Tuesday. "I am very very happy because as you can see there is poverty in this village and I know he will be very well looked after in America."

He said his wife Marita died a month after the baby's birth from childbirth complications and the child had been cared for at the Home of Hope Orphan Care Center in Mchinji, a village near the Zambian border. [...]

The child's grandmother, Asinei Mwale, said she learned about the adoption from [orphanage director, Rev. Thompson John] Chipeta.

"The director of the orphanage came here yesterday and told us that David has been adopted by a famous American singer," Mwale said. "I am very glad for him because having grown up as an orphan myself, I know how tough life can be."

We find the conflicting reports on the adoption troublesome, as if perhaps Madonna until the very last moment was second guessing her decision and hoping she could always explain away an eleventh-hour change of heart by blaming it on the ineptitude of her provided translator, who was unaware of the common secondary usage of the term "adopt" as a British street colloquialism that means, "pat on the head for a photo-op, then leave the child behind as you are whisked by handlers out the door and into an awaiting SUV."