Batman Begins...Every Morning With A Healthy Dump
We thought a handsome companion item to our post about Alec Baldwin threatening to shit on an Arnold Schwarzenegger documentary is this photo, brought to our attention by our friends at BestWeekEver.tv, of a lovingly handcrafted Christian-Bale-on-the-crapper figurine, as precious and detailed as anything Hagen-Renaker has ever produced, and sure to only increase in value with time. The eBay craftsman selling "The Bathroom Man" is willing to hand sculpt your purchase to look like you, but why have a boring, non-celebrity such as yourself immortalized talking a miniature, poorly aimed crap (or are those cinnamon buns?) on the floor, when you can proudly display an unmasked Batman doing the same? And for those for whom the $139.99 price point is not an issue, may we suggest ordering a second sculpture, featuring the likeness of Bale's The Prestige co-star, Hugh Jackman—a handsome, bookend companion that would complete a diorama scenario of the two magician nemeses going head-to-head in a mantelshelf crap-off.