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In an attempt to provide Oscar voters with all the background information necessary to make a thoroughly informed decision on this year's Best Supporting Actress award, the British Sun has helpfully spotlighted the best of all five nominated thespians' previous nude work (link NSFW), performances that no doubt impacted this year's Academy-recognized contributions to their craft. While we'll admit that we're not exactly sure what it means when Penelope Cruz's nipples are compared to "a blind cobbler's thumbs" or when front-running sexagenarian monarch/vixen Helen Mirren's breasts are called a "poignant metaphor of a pair of Wombles' noses snuffling at a plate of truffles," we're sure that their peers will be able to find a way to integrate the tabloid's painstaking research into their upcoming deliberative endeavors.