DNA-Tested Larry Birkhead Confident His Chromosomes Will Do The Babydaddy Talking
Rita Cosby, MSNBC's in-house champion for Anna Nicole Smith-related justice and any incidental ratings that might haphazardly come out of that crusade, reports (and TMZ instinctively regurgitates like a sparrow feeding its scoop-hungry young) that our national (not that one) might soon be over: Larry Birkhead and the baby he claims is his own both have had DNA samples extracted:
DNA samples of Dannielynn and Larry Birhkead [sic] are in the bag, according to MSNBC's Rita Cosby.
Cosby broke the story and TMZ has confirmed that Birkhead and baby were both at a Bahamas doctor's office at 9 this morning and had samples taken. Howard K. Stern's DNA was not taken because by law there is a presumption that he's the father since he's listed as such on the birth certificate.
We don't think we need to remind you that this test could have life-altering consequences for little Dannielynn, whose fate is currently sealed in that pair of test tubes. Would the results doom her to a tortured childhood reared by shadowy lawyer/father /procurer/svengali Howard K. Stern, or, rather, to a potentially far more loving one, raised by an uncredited Entourage day player who only hopes his daughter can one day achieve more? Or would true fatherhood, in a twist ending, ultimately belong to darkhorse candidate Zsa Zsa Gabor's Crazy Fake-Prince Husband, who quietly FedExed a sample cup of his own semen to Bahamian authorities, lest it be omitted from the world's most exciting paternity derby?