Tina Brown Wants To Believe Paris Hilton Is Not Our Generation's Princess Di But She Is Wrong
After a three-week hiatus, Tina Brown is finally blogging over at Salon, and already it's like W. T. F. On why Paris Hilton is so emphatically not today's Princess Diana: "Ms. Hilton's defining moment was a webcam video of herself with a loomin [sic] phallus in her mouth, whereas Lady Diana Spencer at the age of 19 was beet-red-faced with embarrassment when a tabloid photographer snapped her with her infant charge outside a nursery school in a pose against the sunlight that revealed her shapely legs." Also! "Unlike Britney, Lindsay or any other of the pitiful starved waifs attached to hair weaves, she never acted out her private pain by throwing up in the backseat of a car, winding up in rehab or displaying her shaved pudenda to a stricken nation." She's fabulous and hilarious—waifs attached to hair weaves! Pudenda! But. Is she also totally incorrect?
We happen to think that today's starlets are just acting out their dramas in the only way our everything, now, moremoremore internet culture will allow them to, and that the troubles Lady Di got herself into were just the '80s equivalents of today's scandals. Yesterday's ano is today's vagflash, you know?
But whatever. Tina goes on to muse about Kate Middleton, who she thinks has been shunted aside by the palace but not by the Prince—"Don't bet on the poised and private Miss Middleton being counted out as the future Her Maj." But Tina also wonders why she'd want the job—"Being Princess of Wales even post-Diana is almost a fate worse than death." Oh my god, craziness. Welcome to gossip-blogging, Tina! One of us! One of us!
